Soongyu - For All To See

:: Apology ::

   Mingyu stood there allowing the warm water to trickle down over his features, streaming through his dark hair making it appear almost sheer black in colour as it clung to his forehead. His tanned skin glistened as droplets of water wormed their way down his back between shoulder-blades and over tensed muscles in his arms, between the crack of his behind and down meaty thighs until finally pooling on to the shower floor beneath him, swirling away down the drain. 

   How long had he been stood there simply losing himself in the moment? His body was slightly leaning forward, mimicking the all-too familiar position he'd been in yesterday. One forearm was resting against the tiled wall of the shower whilst the other arm was lowered, a hand clasping at his erect member.

   How disgusting... He thought. Was he really touching himself over another man? 

   Mingyu had never considered the possibility of being gay as he had been like any other boy growing up, looking at images of women perhaps too old for his age range, fantasizing about the day he'd lose his virginity to a curvy woman. However here he was panting heavily as he looked towards the wall in front of him - yet instead of seeing the tiles all he could see were the familiar chocolate brown eyes that had been looking up at him with such innocence the day before. 

   His hyung. His Soonyoung. God how he wished he'd kissed him... Although he knew it was wrong, his body had been craving the sweet release of satisfaction all night long. Especially after the far too erotic dream he'd had involving Soonyoung and the kitchen table.
   His body wanted to feel Soonyoung's lips against his, his hands wanted to feel his soft pale skin; not just rest upon his clothing like they had done yesterday. His body ached with need to finish what he had started. But how could he? How could he ever look at those eyes again without a shred of guilt? How could he ever expect his hyung to look at him with that same toothy grin after what happened?

   In his frustration, Mingyu caressed his member harder, teeth biting down on his lower lip to the point of piercing skin, a tiny pool of red liquid rising out only to fade down the streams of water from the shower head above him. Mingyu's breath caught in his throat as his eyes began to flutter, rolling backwards slightly as he pictured Soonyoung being there with him in the shower - skin on skin. 

   A deep, primal groan sounded in Mingyu's throat as he felt a drop in his stomach, his toes instinctively curling as his thighs tensed. His seed spurted out into his ready and waiting hand, shaft throbbing as he rode out his high. Body too consumed in pleasure in that brief instance to focus on anything else.
   A few moments passed and with heavy pants, Mingyu found himself coming back to reality, his eyelids opened slowly and the vision of Soonyoung in front of him faded away. The beige tiles of the wall being a stark reminder of reality.

   Lowering his gaze, his dark orbs watched the semen on his hand drain away, his body now feeling cold and hollow over what he'd done. He'd seriously just masturbated over the image of his hyung - his fellow group member? A man he had to stand alongside on stage and perform in front of their fans with. Someone who he had to maintain a professional relationship with, let alone the friendship they'd had over the years.

   Mingyu's hands balled into tight fists, his left forearm still pressed against the wall with his forehead now resting upon it. With his right hand he punched against the tiles beside him, not too hard to cause any damage, but hard enough that he felt the sting in his knuckles. Sighing softly in what sounded like defeat, he allowed his right arm to flop down to his side, his bare knuckles now red raw after the contact. Water continued to drain over his frame and Mingyu only wished it would also drain away his problems and his thoughts, however he had no such luck.