When It Rains • Geetrick

10

July 9th, 200

582 miles south of Seattle, Washington

22nd day of tour

It's raining when we stop for the night. It's more of a drizzle today, but it was pouring earlier in Seattle, so all I could think of was Gerard. The way he looked when we last talked, nervous, shameful. It wasn't his fault. It's mine for all these stupid feelings. It's not supposed to be like this. I'm supposed to fuck him a few times and move on. I'm not supposed to miss him.

But I do.

So here, as I sit in our bus with Andy and Joe gone and Pete and Mikey's moans in the next bunk over. I can't help but hear my heart break inside and...

I need to talk to him. I need to say sorry for everything I did. For what I said. For how I acted.I pull open my curtain and slip on my shoes, pulling on my jacket and leaving the bus.

I sprint through the maze of buses, desperate to find Gerard, desperate to find my latest mistake and face the problem.

I look around through the drizzling rain, finally seeing the My Chemical Romance bus with a light on inside and the door shut, possibly locked. This is it. I just have to talk to him like Joe said.

My footsteps are slow as I walk to the bus and knock on the door.

Frank answers.

"I need to see Gerard." I say, breathless from the running and the pouring rain.

"He left a little bit ago to walk, he went off that way," Frank points to my left, "Good luck, man."

"Thanks." I reply with a small smile before I wave to him and start making my way in the direction he pointed.

I walk for a while, feeling the rain drizzling down my head and wetting my jacket. The soft sound, like a hum. My warm breaths.

I keep walking, looking around everywhere, passing all the buses, feeling my shoes slosh in the wet mud. Watching the stars overhead. I don't know why I'm still doing this. I don't know why I still want us to be something.

I guess it's because he said there will be a next time and I don't plan on changing that.

That's when I see him, hugging his knees to his chest, leaning against a stump of a tree and letting the rain soak into his jacket carelessly.

I swallow, my hands are shaky, my knees are weak. I need to talk to him. I'm scared, but I need to talk to him.

"G-Gee?"

My voice sounds nervous, with my lip bitten shortly after. He doesn't move at first, doesn't reply, doesn't pay me any attention.

And finally he pats the space next to him and I follow his instructions, sitting beside him.

"How did you know I'd be here?" He asks softly, through his cigarette, swallowing afterwards with his dark brown eyes cloudy with guilt.

"It's rainy out." I reply, "You like the rain."

He turns his head to look at me, pulling the cig from between his lips, "I'm sorry. A-About pressuring you into sex, I shouldn't have, I-"

I stop him, mid sentence to pull his lips against mine roughly despite the fact his mouth tastes like smoke and beer. Just kisses between friends. Friendly. Non-emotional. Just lust. No love.

Right...?

He pulls me closer and leans forward so I'm slowly being set down on the ground with his chest against mine and our crotches rubbing together.