The Freak (mxm)

Chapter 18: Curiosity kills the chick

A/N: Okay, so this chapter will be entirely from Renan's POV. Don't hate me lol, it's actually an important development for the story. Rémy and Nour will be back in the next chapter, pinky promise!

RENAN'S POV

It's very dark outside and I can't even see I'm where I'm going. It's raining cats and dogs and I just want to be tucked in my own bed but I actually live pretty far from Rémy's place. Maybe I should have just stayed with him until dawn. 

Thinking about him makes my stomach churn, though. Everything was so perfect, he was holding me so tenderly, whispering sweet nothings in my ears while caressing my body with a passion I didn't know he had in him. 

... Then he had to entirely ruin it and cry Nour's name as he came.

I walk in a puddle and groan in frustration when cold water seeps through my shoes. I look absolutely ridiculous in that yellow raincoat. Rémy used to say I look adorable in it but he was probably just trying to be nice. How can a grown man be expected to wear something like that? No wonder he fantazises about the hot, manly and insufferable Nour instead of his boyfriend. I look like a shrimp, a twink, a fucktoy. 

People have always judged me for how I looked. When I hadn't even reached puberty, guys would  make fun of me, saying I was going to be a huge fairy who loves to take it up the ass. I guess they weren't wrong about that, but what saddens me is that nobody ever tried to know the real me. I was doomed to be the frail-looking boy, a fairy, a coward, a sorry excuse of a man, a guy who can't stand up for himself, a cunning little shit whose only purpose in life is to seduce bigger men. I was always picked up last in sports, while people automatically assumed I loved gossips and had an incredible sense of fashion.

I don't care anymore, though. They treated me like a sickly sweet puppy? I decided to let them believe I truly was a harmless airhead. It allows me to trick them more easily. He. I'm a true Slytherin, and proud to be. 

Rémy was different. He always treated me like an equal, always asking for my opinion. He was interested in what was inside my head, too. We met at a party, and after I told him I liked to paint, he asked me if I could show him some of my paintings. Even though I didn't show my art to many people, I surprisingly agreed. A few months later, we were dating and we had been together for a bit more than a year now.

Only, I had to ruined it. We never had a major fight but we were gradually drifting apart. I can see that now. He was so smart, a bright boy doing a thesis on God knows what. I felt stupid compared to him so I stop saying what was on my mind. Instead, I focused on being cute. We had sex quite often so I kept telling myself that we were okay. It didn't matter if we only talked about trivial things from the everyday life. What do you want to eat tonight? Hey, darling, have you seen my gray pants?

How could I have been so stupid? So blind? I bet everyone else could tell our couple was doomed to implode.

"Watch where you're going, short stuff" a gravy voice suddenly boomed as my head collides with a solid chest.

"Sorry" I mumble, almost falling as the massive guy pushes me back. 

"Whatever, he grumbles, giving me one last warning look before walking away. 

Realization that I'm way too visible in this yellow coat hits me like a ton of bricks. I can't stay on the streets. Rémy has been telling me over and over again that it's dangerous to venture off these streets at night and here I am in my little yellow raincoat, like a mouse begging to be killed. 

I don't really want to cross ways with guys who could be much more agressive that the asshole I've just bumped into. 

How did he call me already? Oh yeah, short stuff.