Guiding Light || OC x Draco Malfoy

Chapter 13:

How do you even follow up a statement like that? What do you say to the child of the man that loves you after he tells you as so? Neither of us really knew what to do afterwards, so the conversation was put on a side tab, but never really taken out of either of our heads.

We just talked about comics and stuff for a while, but after about half an hour, with Draco still not back, I began to get worried. I was enjoying my time with Scorpius and all, but I could notice that even he was getting antsy when I looked close enough.

But we continued out banter for far longer than we probably should have, and it was ended abruptly by the nurse from earlier coming back. She opened the door, and told Scorpius to come with her. He looked at me forlorny and quickly scurried to give me a hug before he climbed out of the bed went over to the nurse, waving me a small goodbye.

I returned the wave with a sad smile. I hadn't realized there were tears in my eyes until I went to look at my hands and found them blurred by tears as they threatened to fall from my eyes. Scorpius was a lovely young boy, and took after his father so much it honestly haunted me at first. The same hair, same eyes, and even the same grins once I got them both to crack one.

Scorpius was just a scaled-down filler for the Draco-sized puzzle piece missing in me, and both of them filled the gap rather well, as awkward as that sounds. And now I was beginninggining to miss them both terribly.

Draco didn't come back for a few days. I saw him once in passing as he spoke to a guard outside my door, but he didn't come in and he never spoke to me in full. He glanced at me and turned away as quick as the exchange happened, his eyes filled with pain. That felt like a spear driving into my heart.

Taste of my own medicine, right? The bitterness my mouth wasn't nearly as soothing as blood, but it was warm and sort of tart like it.

Weeks passed and there was still no sign of either of the Malfoy men. My nurse would come in to care for me, and without fail, I would tap into what little dignity I had left, and ask about them. Ask where Draco was, ask if he was okay, ask when the next time I would talk to him would be, ask if I was ever going to see the man who loved me again.

Each time, the nurse would look at me. Sometimes it was just acknowledging me, other times it was taking pity on me, or begging me to shut up with her gaze; unable to say so in fear of violating her contract. Waiting in a que to be the next Gabrielle.

Is that what happened to Draco? They hired him as my representative, but did they think he was getting a little too chummy, and then wiped his memory of me? Cleaned the slate, if you will. Did they think that Draco would become someone like me just from having sentimental moments? If they did, that raised the question of how did they know about those moments at all. Hidden cameras that got the moment when I let myself slip; video proof that I had opened my heart to him, and that he had accepted the invitation and closed the door behind him.

Did they know that I loved Draco Malfoy? That would make one of us if they did.

I kept running that sentence over and over again in my head. I loved Draco Malfoy. It didn't sound right. I have no attraction to Draco Malfoy. Well that was wrong too. I didn't love him, but there was something there. My heart wasn't beating in tandem with his, but the syncopations weren't all that far off, either. My heart tapping behind his, running to catch up but ultimately falling behind. I think my main question was whether or not he would turn around to see how far behind I was.

Was he going to turn around and pick me up out of the mud? Carry me all the way to the finish line, even if my legs were dead to the world? I wanted him to do that. I wanted that reassurance that someone would be there for me when I needed them. I wanted to be independent, but at some point I need a shoulder to lean on, a pair of arms to lift me up when I can't walk any farther.

I wanted Draco Malfoy, and I was coming to terms with that.

What I couldn't wrap my head around, however, was why I couldn't see him. It made no sense to me. It wasn't unusual for hm to be away for a few days, what with being a father and all, but it had been more than 3 weeks since he had been in with Scorpius, and my nerves were getting worse and worse as the days bore on.

The only remedy that I ever got for my nerves was a single note that the nurse gave me when she came in. When I saw the paper in her hands, my heart fluttered against my ribs. I was hoping beyond hope that it was Draco trying to communicate with me.

But I was wrong. The note wasn't from Draco; far from, actually. Other than the courtesy greeting, this note had no emotion. At least not the emotion I was expecting. Instead of a more-than-friendly greeting and then an explanation about where Draco has been, I got a note from the Minister of Magic herself.

In light of recent events, your current ward residence in this hospital has been terminated, effective immediately. The next phase of your treatment will begin tomorrow.

~ Minister of Magic,

Hermione Granger

I could actually feel my blood boil and fester beneath my skin. I knew they were going to come for me eventually, but every time I mentioned it in passing to Draco, it was meant as a sort of joke. An absolutely sick and twisted stab-- pun intended--at humor, but a joke nonetheless. Except now no one was messing around. They were really coming for me tomorrow, and there was nothing I could do about it on my own. Not in the state I'm in at least.

If there were one good thing to come from my stint with Gabrielle, it would be that the nurses took my comment about my living standards to heart. My hands were no longer restrained at all hours of the day, and the food that they gave me was greater in quantity and much better tasting than before. If I had to wager a guess, they must have figured that I wouldn't have thought to move on my own.

They were very wrong in that assumption, however, and whenever I could muster up the energy, I would stand and walk around. At first it was rough. Trying to find my footing on the squishy flooring was hard, unlike the floor when I would inevitably fall on it moments later. I missed having arms to guide me around and keep me upright. I missed having a friend to talk to. I missed Draco.

I missed the way he smiles at me, and how gentle he is. But I also like that he treats me like a real person. Not like some sadistic monster, and not like some kicked and bleeding puppy. He cared for me when I needed it, and loved me when I needed it too. Apparently I filled some of those roles in his roster as well. He had another adult to talk to, but it wasn't with all of the formalities that his job required.

Even Scorpius benefitted, having a non-family member to hang out with, even if it was only for a few hours. I loved Scorpius too. Through all the stories that Draco had told me, I had learned much more about Scorp than I had ever expected to know. Some of the stories were sad, like him breaking his arm as a 3-year old, and others were sunshine-ray happy, like him discovering superheros or doing his first feat of magic.

All those fantasies about parenthood I had when I was little were floating back to the surface from their repressed place in the back of my mind. All of those naming-convention titles I wanted for my children were flashing in my mind. Every Annabelle, Emma, Mariah, and Jenny that I had graced my babydolls with were now materializing with new, more human faces.

The one thing that I began to pick up on around child 2 was that they all shared some striking resemblance to me. My pale green eyes, or my chin, or even my hair color. The more, for lack of a better word, upsetting eye-catcher was the fact that every jawline that belonged to me was also paired with diamond-colored eyes. Or every lock of brown hair had a smirk that could kill the devil himself.

Draco's features swirled with mine to create beautiful new humans. I wanted them; I wanted kids that looked like that. Having those kids also meant having Draco himself. Try as I might, I couldn't find a reason I didn't want that either.