Shall I say goodbye?

Part 11: Recall the past

Arthit hurriedly pulled the blanket covering his naked body. He glanced at Kongpob who is sitting beside him, Kongpob is hugging his own knee and crying. The sound of crying twisted Arthit's heart. Kongpob seemed like to hurting so badly. Arthit feels like he is the one who hurting Kongpob's heart. Why does he feel like this? Every word he heard from Kongpob's mouth making his heart felt a little bit better. Even Kongpob didn't have the intention to betray him but he was hurting so much until himself confused and didn't know how to handle this matter. Is his word real? Could he believe it? Arthit kept asking himself again and again, what should he do right now? Forgive Kongpob? Give him a chance? Keep distance? Runaway again? What is the best solution for both of them? In his heart, he clearly knows that he still loves him but the bitter memory kept reminding him that he should not give himself the risk anymore.

But now he is a parent and as a parent, He should not think about only himself. He should think about his daughter's feeling too. Minnie loves Kongpob's so much even she was born without him beside her side and looking after her but she still loves him and seemed like to love him the most. Minnie is very young and she is really innocent. She never questions him why her mom is a man. She can understand everything and understand him well. Arthit owed her a lot, owed her a father and a warmly family. This time he should understand her and give her a chance to live with her daddy.

After a long thought, finally, he can decide what he supposes to do. He took a deep breathing and reach out his hand to touch Kongpob's hand. Kongpob gazed at Arthit and pursed his lips, not saying anything. Feeling terrified and guilty for his actions. Even he has no intention to rape him but his action could not forgive too. Nothing could change the fact that he had hurt Arthit. His tears still flew down his cheeks, looking at Arthit's face, guilt and regret swallowed him.

Arthit helped him wiping his tears. Kongpob looked at Arthit face with his surprise. His heart beat very fast and it's very faster until he could not breathe.

" Kongpob, I'm sorry that my word was hurting you. P' Forth is not my lover, He is P'Beam's boyfriend."

Kongpob nodded his head and his hand is holding Arthit's hand.

" I'm sorry too for hurting you and almost rape you. I really regret it. I lost my sanity and can't control it."

" Hmm! I understand. Stop crying and tell me everything, what happened?"

" Yes, P'Arthit."

" On my graduation day, my family made a party for me. Actually, I didn't want to go but I cannot refuse my dad order. At first, I thought it's a family party but my mom invited her friend to join us too. I was drunken, when I woke up in the morning I saw myself slept with Apple on the bed. Before I could realize anything my mom and her mom caught us on the bed. She forced me to marry her but I refused because I believed that I didn't do anything to her. That time I decided to live with you at your apartment. Two months later before my birthday one weeks, my dad called her to back home with his angry voice. When I arrived, my dad was very angry at me and told me that Apple was pregnant two months with me. I couldn't believe it and I still refused them to marry her. My mom sudden had a heart attack and need to surgery as soon as possible to save her life and she didn't agree to treat her health if I didn't break up with you and marry Apple. I can't see her dies in front of my eyes even my decision was hurt me and you. I was fooled by thinking if I told you the reason I broke up with you because I betrayed you better than telling you that my mom threatened me with her life. And maybe you will not hurt too much and easy to forget me. I didn't know what I had thought that time. It's very crazy. On my wedding days, Apple decided to tell the truth because she could not see me hurting anymore. Everything was my mom planning. She helped my mom because she loves me and didn't want to see me be gay. I told her I'm not gay I just love you. But I'm really thankful to her that she told me the truth. Then I was going to find in your apartment but you already left. I tried to find you everywhere until I lost my hope but I never give up even once. And I never have anyone, my heart is belongs to only you but I clearly knew that my past actions was hurting you. You would forgive me easily. But I want you to know that I really regretted my mistake. All I can do now is asking you a chance. P'Arthit, Could you forgive me?"

Arthit looks up quietly at the man before him. As he was listening to all Kongpob's explanation, his heart felt a little bit of relief but at the same time he also has mixed feelings. What is his feelings right now? Sad, happy or hurt? He couldn't answer himself too. If Kongpob told him the truth at that time. What should he do? Maybe his choice was just running away.

Kongpob is waiting Arthit's answer silently. He still hold Arthit's hand and looking at Arthit's face. This time is his last hope. He wishes Arthit will give him a chance.

" If you're not married, then who is she that I've seen in your home?

" A women in my house?"

Kongpob looked confused and tried to find out whose is she? After that he can realize something and then he put up the smile.

" If you mean to a women you saw in my home that day, she is a English teacher. I asked her to teach Minnie at home while I'm finding a new kindergarten for her."

" Emm!"

" And now, could you answer me?"

Arthit stayed silent for a while then he sighted and nodded his head to Kongpob.

" I forgive you."

The smiling placed on Kongpob's face as his heart kept beating so fast.

" Thank you, P'Arthit."

" Even I forgive you but it doesn't mean I will start with you again. I will give you a chance to raise Minnie with me."

Kongpob hurriedly nod his head to agree with Arthit even though Arthit didn't want to start with him again but he still have a chance to make his sun fall in love with him again.

" I promise you I will take care you well even if I don't deserve you but I will try my best until you accept me."

" Emm!"

" Can we go back to Thailand now?"

" No, P' Forth asked me to wait him. Tomorrow he will come here again. After that I will go back with you."

" Yes P, It's up to you."

" Now you can tell your man to bring our baby back. I'm afraid that she will cry when she doesn't see me and she also doesn't have dinner yet"

" Okay P! I will make a call now."

" Err Kongpob, can you make a call outside the room? I want to wear the clothes before Minnie come."

" Yes P"

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30 minutes later

Minnie came back with Jay. She looks so happy. Instead of crying, she smiled at both of them and make Arthit feeling strange at her behavior.

Now She is in Kongpob's arms. He is hugging and kiss her cheeks. He asked her if she was hungry but she told them that she already have a dinner with uncle jay and other uncle. Arthit was relieved when he can see his baby smile and laugh. But suddenly Minnie asked them back and also making Arthit blush and embarrassed the same time.

" Uncle Jay told Minnie that Daddy and Mommy was busy to find a brother to play with Minnie but Minnie want to have a sister than. Mommy and daddy gives Minnie a baby sister, please."

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To be continued

This chapter maybe disappoint you but I hope you can enjoy it.