Miss jordieblob16 has a daaaaaaaare!
Bring it ON!
WHOO!
Wow, you're enthusiastic!
Yup! There's no use complaining about it if you know that you have to do it.
*raises eyebrow* Alright... *pulls our card* "Merry and Pippin: I dare you to send Legolas (who saved your sorry butts in The Two Towers) in a box to me (shirt not included)."
What?!
NO!
WE REFUSE!!!
*opens magic portal* Go get Legolas.
No.
Now.
Uh-uh.
*pushes Merry in*
*falling* AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGggggggghhhhhhh...!!!!
*hides in corner* I AIN'T GOING NO WHERE!
DOUBLE NEGATIVE BECOMES A POSITIVE! *pushes him in*
*falling* AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGggggggghhhhhhh...!!!!
---
Three minutes later...
---
*pops out of portal* We found him!
Legolas: *climbs out of portal* So where are we going?
You're going into a box!
Legolas: What's a box?
*facepalm* EVEN PIPPIN KNOWS WHAT A BOX IS!!!
Shush, Tarwa! A box is a very nice place, Legolas.
Legolas: Ooh! Boxes sound great! *climbs into box*
Yo got to take yo shirt off.
Legolas: WHAT?!
It was a dare.
Legolas: WHAT DARE?!
*pulls his top off* BYE-BYE! *seals up box* Alright Merry, you're going to the post office to send this.
But how do I get there?
Take my parents' car.
Alright... *gets into car and drives off*
You know he can't drive, right? Your parents' car is toast.
OH, NUTS. *runs after Merry* MY PARENTS ARE GOING TO KILL ME!
*laughs* *notices an envelope on Tarwa's desk* *opens it* Oh! Another dare. Also from doodling_dreams! "Pippin, I dare you to climb down Frodo's chimney when he's asleep and get a smoke machine and make his bedroom all smoky and mysterious. Then Merry, I dare you to hide under his bed and start whispering stuff like "My precioussss..." and "The Riinnngggg..." and throw glitter in the air. Then I dare you both to put on Sauron masks and while Frodo's all like "What on Earth is going on?!" creep up and jump on him.".
Woah, that's a crazy dare.
What? How did you get back so fast?!
*sheepishly hands over Pippin's wand*
*snatches it*
Alright Pip, off to Frodo's house!
---
Ten minutes later...
---
*climbing down chimney with smoke machine* I sure hope this works... *sneaks over to Frodo's bed*
Frodo: *wakes up* Pippin?
Uhhh ... no?
Frodo: I didn't know you helped Santa deliver presents!
Wha...?
Frodo: *grabs smoke machine* YAY! JUST WHAT I WANTED! *hugs smoke machine* Thank Santa for me!
Uhh ... it's November ... Christmas is next month...
Frodo: Knock, knock! *taps his head* Ever heard of Christmas in July? Duhh!
But it's not July!
Frodo: *already asleep again*
*comes down chimney* Did it work?
Nup.
*comes down chimney* Legolas is all ready to be shipped off.
*grabs Merry* ACT LIKE GOLLUM!
What?
NOW!
Uhhh ... tricksy hobbitses?
Sam: *barges through door* I HEARD GOLLUM! WHERE IS HE? I WANT TO CHOP HIS HEAD OFF!!!!!
Frodo: *wakes up* Sam, what are you doing?
Sam: I heard Gollum!
Frodo: Ain't no Gollum in here!
Sam: *screams*
Frodo: What?
Sam: *points to Merry, Pippin and Tarwa who are wearing flaming lidless eye masks* THE EYE!!!
Frodo: *screams like a girl and sprays them with pepper spray*
ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!
ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!
ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!
Sam: ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!
Frodo: ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!
Pirate: ARRRRRRRRR M'HEARTIES!!!!
Frodo: WHERE DID A PIRATE COME FROM?!
Pirate: IT'S US MASTER: SMÉAGOL! DOES IT LIKE OUR HALLOWEENSES COSTUMESSS?
IT'S NOT HALLOWEEN AND IT'S NOT CHRISTMAS! IT IS NOVEMBER! A TIME WHEN THE MELBOURNE CUP TAKES PLACE!!!
Gandalf: *appears on horse* STOP THIS RACKET AND HURRY BACK TO EARTH! WE HAVE TO WATCH THE MELBOURNE CUP!!! *rides off*
Ooh! A pony from Equestria! *follows horse happily*
*facepalm*
------------------
Hiiii! Yup, I decided to update again! I have SOOOO many dares for Merry and Pippin, but I can't find the time to do them!
Okay, sooooo ... a little note on this chapter. There were two things mentioned that mainly Australians and people of the Southern Hemisphere will understand: The Melbourne Cup and Christmas in July.
Allow moi to explain.
For people who aren't from Australia: The Melbourne Cup is a horse race that happens here in Melbourne, Australia. I don't like it that much because it's just a time for people to get drunk and blow their money betting on the horses. I think it is a weird idea, but no offence to those who like it. 😊
The race was yesterday. Two horses died. One fell and broke his leg and had to be put down and the other had a heart attack.
Rest in Peace Araldo and Admire Rakti 😔
For people who live in the Northern Hemisphere: Here in the South we have winter when you have summer: in the middle of the year. So we don't get snow at Christmas time! So many people like to have Christmas in July (when it's winter) AAAAAND Christmas in December. BUT the whole gifts and presents thing only happens in December. In July people just sing carols and eat Christmas dinners.
I think.
I don't really know because I don't have Christmas in July.
Even though I live in Australia.
Lol.
LOL.
LOOOOOOOOL.
Okay, I'm done.
Bye.
YOU ARE READING
Only the Craziest - Written by Merry and Pippin
Fanfiction• Finalist of мα∂ιв79'ѕ 'тнє нσввιт/ℓσтя fαиfιcтισи cσмρєтιтισи' • Hello every person in the magical land of Computer! It's us: Merry and Pippin! Ya know, the handsomest, smartest Hobbits to ever live? Especially me, Merry. Ow, ow, okay, stop hittin...
