The Nice And Accurate Stories Of The Ineffable Husbands: Good Omens

The Revenge

"Hello Crowley, long time no see" said Hastur "Disappointed by our surprise?"
"Just tell me what am I here for" said Crowley in hopes it wasn't what he feared it was, they checked.
"Oh we got a little surprise visit brought to you from the deepest depths of Hell" Lord Belcebbub looked at the jester.
"Hello Crowley" said the jester with a malificent smile "remember me?"
"How could I forget, poor Johnny who never had anything nice, felt right into my temptation, good times, but things have changed I see."
"Our new friend is here to tell us a few interesting things about you and that angel of yours, wouldn't you like to know?"
"Oh Johnny, you wouldn't do that would you?" It was indeed what Crowley feared, they got him.
"In fact, I already did, and now I'm free from here, free from the damnation you brought me, they offered me freedom for just a few words, I took the deal, because fuck you Crowley" Since when did a 14th century jester had such modern language?
"We will handle things from here, leave before we change our mind" Said Hastur to John, "go, run." "Now, anything to say Crowley?"
"What has that stupid boy told you that brought me here?, tell me" Crowley's snake eyes lit up, he was fucked, he knew exactly what Johnny had told them, but that may gain him some time to think about his escape plan.
"You are soft for that angel, are you? Could we say... In love?"
"Oh were are not-" Crowley had to stop, he didn't even know what Aziraphale and him were "were just friends" it hurt even saying it.
"Then what about that soft kiss under the stars? Do friends do that?" Hastur did his research well for once, unfortunately, this was not the best moment he could have to get it right. And now Crowley was shocked, no backup plan anymore, no way to escape, he was trapped, now he would be gone forever, he knew the consequences for hanging out with angels, imagine the consequences for kissing them. "You look shocked, what is it? You didn't expect us to check? You think we didn't know about your change of body with the angel?"
Crowley couldn't say a word, he was lost.
"I bet now you wish your angel was here to save you, well, we do not grant wishes but, he's here" Lord Belcebbub clapped twice "Bring the prisoner" shouted, and two other demons brought Aziraphale into the room. Poor angel had tried to get to Hell, but how were demons going to let an angel in? He had to try either way, but he failed, the demons got him, and he couldn't run away.
"Angel! What on Earth... Hell, are you doing here?" First words Crowley spoke in a while.
"I had to come... You were going to do something foolish, well I see you did, I felt guilty, you know I read your letter, I had to save you"
"Enough talking prisoner" Aziraphale was interrupted by Hastur. "You know Crowley, we've been watching you both, you fooled us, and here, we don't like being fooled, and because of you we have now an intruder here, so let's show him what we do with them here"
"Bring the fire!" Shouted again Belcebbub.
"No! You can't do that, you'll start a war, I'm an angel you can't-" Aziraphale shouted in panic, he was about to die, and Crowley could do nothing about it because now other two demons were holding him tightly.
"Oh, about that, don't you think we didn't think about it" Belcebbub said as Gabriel appeared behind him. "We've got permission, and help."
"Oh so you are also bringing public? How kind of you, assholes" Said Crowley, almost crying.
His best friend and part time lover was about to die, and he knew he was next and what was worst is that he could do nothing about it.
It all had been planned, that's why Heaven had called Aziraphale that exact day, that's why he had been away, Heaven and Hell didn't like traitors, and they had actually worked together to stop two of them, now they were going to pay. Everything had been planned, front to back, they watched enough to know that without Aziraphale, Crowley would go back to Hell, so Heaven made certain that would happen, and they knew perfectly well that Aziraphale would go to save Crowley when he figured out it was a trap, but this time they got them both right were they wanted them.
Hastur lit the fire and the demons brought closer the angel. Aziraphale could feel it burning, he felt the heat on his face, this was going to be painful. He started crying and looked at Crowley one last time. "I love you, even when I die, I will love you, forever"
Those were his last words, the demons threw him into the fire. Crowley tried to escape the hands of the demons shouting "Aziraphale! I love you don't leave me like this! You are my best friend! You can't die!" He cried, he fought, and got rid of the dirty hands the demons had on him, and stepped right into the fire, but it was too late, all he could save was Aziraphale's burned jacket.
"You fuckers" he cried "you killed my best friend, I'll make pay, I swear I'll make you suffer, bastards, you are scum, I hate you, you'll pay" The demons got a hold of Crowley again, who was now on the floor, crying. He raised his head enough to see Gabriel bringing a jar full of water.
"Your sentence is still up Crowley, you were sentenced to extintion by holy water, and you shall pay it" Belcebbub said with rejoice.
Crowley knew that had to happen, but now without Aziraphale, he didn't care anymore, he was ready to die.
The demons took a step back, and the next thing Crowley saw was a cascade of holy water falling over him.