The Nice And Accurate Stories Of The Ineffable Husbands: Good Omens

Love Is A Boat...

"I'll get through this" Aziraphale said with a glimpse of hope on his eyes, the angel always had hope, no matter how bad everything got, if someone had hope, that was Aziraphale "I always do."
"Not through this Aziraphale, I've been  there, it will change you, I can't have you going through that"
"But even if it's the solution, you won't have me anyway if you leave" Aziraphale was desperate, holding the demon by his coat.
"I'd rather be gone, knowing you are okay than be here, make you do something that will hurt you so much you will change, the pain is never gone angel, I can't make you go through this, I need to leave, before it gets worse" Crowley started opening the door, Aziraphale was about to let him go.
"Show me your wings Crowley."
"What?" Crowley turned.
"Show them, your wings"
Why would he want to see them? What was he planning? Anyway, Crowley closed the door and opened his pitch black wings, nothing new to see really. "That's it? Can I leave now?"
"I don't get it" Aziraphale sounded frustrated now "If my wings are changing because of you, because going against all angels, why yours haven't? I mean, you went against those of your own kind, what make us any different?"
"Aziraphale, I have fallen already, and what it's done, can't be undone, when the angels pushed the 'time to fall' button on me, there was no turning back, I can't unfall, you can't either. Look, your wings, will be this tone forever, no matter how good you do, they will never be that white you used to have, but if I leave, if you try and live a normal angel life, without me, there is a chance you might be forgiven, they won't get worse, like nothing ever happened."
"But I don't want a normal angel life, not now, not ever Crowley, I don't care if I fall, I can talk with God, She might now how to fix this, I-"
"Aziraphale, God doesn't have anything to do with this. The angels, they are the ones in charge, God is just a writer of a play, and we are the characters, this, everything happening right now, might have been written eons ago, and there is no way we could go against what the writer of the play decided."
"Okay so you leave and then what? It doesn't get worse? What if this is not about you Crowley, what if it's about me, about my actions?"
"If there is a chance it's me, we should take it, it might save you"
"But if it isn't I will fall, and nobody will be here for me, nobody will understand. I begging you to stay, I need you"
Crowley didn't say a word, he looked at Aziraphale, not even saying goodbye, he left.
It wasn't that he didn't love Aziraphale, it was actually the opposite, he cared too much about him, he felt guilty of what was happening to the angel, he couldn't help it, and he wasn't actually planning on leaving the angel forever, just for the day, he needed time to think, and he had a plan.
Crowley felt on his insides that if Aziraphale went back to heaven, or even tried speaking with the angels, he would be lost forever, so if Aziraphale couldn't talk to them, maybe he could. Crowley wasn't planning on doing it on a nice way.
He went back to his apartment, drew a symbol on the floor and set a few candles on the right places and proceeded to do what had discorporated Aziraphale the last time he did it, he needed answers.
"I need to speak to an authority or whatever you angels call it" Crowley said, but that wasn't his intention. Nothing happened, then the wind blew out the candles. "Perfect" Crowley said, now it was just a matter of time.
The demon knew well that Heaven wanted to catch him, he knew that an angel would appear at his front door any moment, he knew the agreement they had, about leaving them alone wouldn't last forever, and he was right. Someone opened his door.
An angel walked into the room, to see Crowley sitting on his chair/throne just like if he were expecting him.
"Hello, I didn't expect company today but..." Crowley threw a match to the floor, fire surrounded the angelic guest "I guess I did actually expect it" the angel was trapped. "Now, I need some answers" he walked around the fire, observing the angel, no backup, that was nice. "Tell me about Aziraphale, why him? Why is he going to the big fall?"
The angel gave no answer, just a defying look, the fire came closer to him, Crowley controlled it.
"Answer my question, you don't want to become fried wings, nobody would like that"
Still no answer, and the fire came closer again.
"What kind of useless angels they send this days, they can't even speak"
"I'm not telling you anything demon" finally the angel spoke.
"Well maybe not to me, but please make sure when you get back and report this situation to the heavens," Crowley said as he walked towards the door "make sure you tell those bastards that I need some answers, and as it seems I'm not getting them, tell them that Heaven might turn someday into 'Fried Chicken Festival'. Oh and if when I come back anything is missing, you are the first." Crowley closed the door, leaving the angel inside, giving him time to go away before the fire went out, he was going back to the bookshop, back to Aziraphale, he didn't have time to waste on this, if he could not help the angel, at least he would be by his side, he would help him in everything he could, after all, he loved him, angel or not.
He arrived at the bookshop. The door was open.
Candles, he could smell them, and a note on the floor, folded. It was written in Aziraphale's handwriting.
'And if love is a boat...'