Violet Odyssey

Chapter 32: Sickness - Axton

August 5th, 1987.

I was to turn eighteen in about a month, sometimes I couldn't quite wrap it my head around.

In about three months, I was gonna have a baby of my own.

Well, Tara was too.

But it was still ours.

I couldn't believe it.

We'd been to Lamaze classes together when I was home from tour, I'd call her daily when I was away to make sure she was safe, her parents and I would talk to make sure she was taking care of herself, and everything in-between.

I was just too excited for fatherhood, honestly.

Since Nic was on her honeymoon doing God knows what, the tour paused and we were all home.

Jeremy was with Leslie during chemo, Scott was either with his mom or getting high with a random girl, Cedric was with his dad, and I was looking for houses with Tara.

Tara and I were still debating over baby names. If a girl, I wanted to name her Anya, and Tara wanted to name her Anita, and the middle name Bowie, which I agreed to. If a boy, we agreed to name him Bowie Damon Burton.

She pointed out to me that Anita Pallenberg and Keith Richards had a son named Tara, so it was fate, until I reminded her that their baby died, so it was more of a curse. Either way, it'd make more sense for Cedric to name his child Anita because Richards was his last name.

No matter what, there'd be no way I'd name my child Anita.

It would either be Bowie Damon Burton or Anya Bowie Burton.

We were both stubborn, no doubt.

I was currently driving to my parent's house from the drug store.

Tara hadn't been feeling very good, so I left a trash can by her side if the bed, along with a cold rag and some fans. I'd just bought a couple more fans and some medicine for her head.

As I drove, I noticed the Polaroid photos tapped to the mirror of my sun visor. One was of me in short basketball shorts and no shirt on, the other of Tara next to me in a huge blue button-up maternity dress. It definitely didn't look like something she'd wear.

I reached for a cigarette in the glove compartment, only to find more photos. One was of me playing bass and singing to Tara's bump as she held a middle finger towards the camera. Another photo was of me driving, and on the white part below the photo, she wrote the words 'Another ultrasound of Baby Burton, singing to The Doors, July 1987.' The third was of me sitting on my bed, drawing something on loose-leaf paper. 'December 27th, 1986. Axton tries to draw a koi fish - fails.'

It was hard to think I'd been with her that long. I used to be like the rest of the boys, but the peppy personality and smoking hot freckles of Tara drew me in, and I got lost in her heart.

The fourth photo was of my, shirtless but with a leather jacket on, playing my bass as I stared at sheet music. 'Axton tries to learn "Under Pressure" by David Bowie and Queen. 2 AM, March 21st, 1987.' Oh, how much Tara appreciated that. Her David Bowie love was just too much for me to handle, so it was as if I had to learn it. The fifth photograph was of her and me together, as per usual. Only this time, we were on the beach together. Odds are, it was taken by Nic. It was the summer of last year, and I seem to have picked her up bridal style and was trying to force her to get into the water. There was no doubt she hated it too.

The last one was of me painting her wall, though it was obvious it was awful. I was just in a pair of short shorts, again, with a white Metallica shirt.