Tale of the mage hero [Completed]

Heresy, Treason, and a tower!?

The seven of us were enjoying tea time when a royal lap dog and a church thot walked in. "Lady mage hero?" The thot says. I ignore her as I grab another cookie. The thot seems put off but the royal guard is angered. "You're presence is required in the throne room right now. Failure to do so is considered a heretical treasonous act you stupid monstrous bitch." The nun nods. "Hes right! You're no hero. You're a worse monster than the shield devil! I bet that angel was an illusion! There's no way someone like YOU would be in contact with the divinity you hateful demon!" Now that gets my attention. I stand up enraged as I march over to them. "Who the fuck do you think you are to interrupt my tea time/party? The sign was flipped closed for a reason! I'm exhausted from the waves and just want a moment to rest. So go tell your highness and popeliness that I'm currently BUSY and have no reason to rush my tired body. If me resting is treason and heresy, then brand me a heretic! Your king and pope have done nothing for me or this kingdom, so if you want to denounce me... I WILL GLADLY LEAVE! NOW BE GONE YOU TRASH!" I beat them senseless and kick them out.

"AND DON'T YOU EVER COME BACK OR ASK ME FOR ANYTHING AGAIN YOU DAMN SCUM! THIS 'HERETIC' HAS HAD IT WITH THIS COUNTRIES BULLSHIT!" I scream at them as they run to the castle. I smirk in satisfaction as I sit down and finish my cake. A half hour later I sneak into the castle. The nun and guard are telling the king and pope how I insulted them and attacked them.

I play the recording of the guards words. "You're presence is requested in the throne room right now. Failure to do so is considered a heretical treasonous act you stupid monstrous bitch." The guard pales and the king looks furious. Then I play the nuns words next. "He's right! You're no Hero. You're a worse monster than the shield devil! I bet that angel was an illusion! There's no way someone like YOU would be in contact with the divinity you hateful demon!" Under the popes disappointed stare the nun looks ashamed.

"That's what they said right before I kicked them out. The store was closed and I was resting after the wave. Is a hero not entitled to a break? Oh wait- I'm not a hero. I'm a heretic! Oh silly me, I almost forgot that I decided to finish my tea time break before coming here. Guess I'm not welcome in this country... I know! I'll go to Faulby instead! At least there, heroes are welcome... and probably NOT insulted."

The king sweats and the pope bows. "My Blessed Hero, I promise these two will be punished severely for their actions. They will be crippled and banished from the capital and church for their transgressions, so please forgive our oversight on this matter!" I hum. "Very well. Now I dare say, what seems to be the reason of this summons? If it is in regards to that angel I'll be frank. That is a gift granted to me by the spirit god. She's like a puppet but with the powers and form of an angel. As far as I'm aware she can attack and heal fatal wounds and decimated lands... I never learned much about angels so if that's what they tend to do I guess it's a genuine angel? I've never seen one before so...."

The pope smiles. "We never questioned whether it was! That was indeed a divine messenger. But, this humble priest would like to ask if you could possible give that power to us of the church? It's only right that it is worshipped properly."

I grit my teeth in rage. "IMPUDENCE! you dare ask me to give you the blessing given to me by a god that is not yours to you? Greedy thieves! No wonder that nun had such a mouth! You're asking me to commit a sin against my patron deity who has protected and communed with me? That would be spitting in my gods face! Just by asking such a thing shows how unfaithful and greedy you are! You're spitting in not only your gods face by saying such things, but my own as well! Although gods may be busy, they always hear and know of what their followers do and say.  Do you not fear the wrath of your own god or my god? You claim to be a faithful follower, yet instead of asking your god for a blessing you ask me for mine! Do you think so little of the gods powers and feelings that they would let you off freely? I have spoken my mind on the gods of my world in an ill manner, and I felt their wrath for it. Though it was a mere warning to not be disrespectful anymore, I was careful not to insult any further. But in my world there are stories of thousands of heroes and gods. And almost all of their stories end in tragedy in no small part because of a god. Hell, the queen of gods was a jealous lady and even turned a mortal woman that the king of gods was in love with, into livestock and tortured her! That same goddess tossed out her own child cause he was ugly, but took him back when she realized he crafted the most heavenly pieces of jewelry. And that's just one goddess of one countries myths. And that's not even when she was super mad. The point is that you really don't want to cross the gods. And what you want to do is definetly crossing a god. By even suggesting such a thing in public you could be accused of heresy against your god, and so could I. We could both be screwed because of you. And not just us, in my world sometimes the gods it's reaches world-wide. Causing droughts and bad harvests, terrible blizzards and natural disasters, taking away the sun and FIRE which are essential to life, then there's the story of Pandora's box which is basically about how all the gods came together to make a beautiful woman who was told not to open the cursed box which she was entrusted with. She opened it and let out 4 of 5 humanity ruining bats... we're lucky she shut the 5th one in cause that would've taken away our hope for the future. That 5th bat was what I like to call the "spoiler alert" bat. Basically it would've told people what was destined to happen to them each day leaving them with no hope for the future.... so that sucks ass, especially since it was the gods glittering golden loot crate of secret goodies... so for everyone's sale let's pretend this conversation never happened okay?"