Pillars

Chapter 29: Goodbye is a Stupid Word (Lorin)

I found dad sitting on the back porch, peeling the label off his water bottle. He had said he didn't want to be in the way, but I insisted he stay a few days after mom's funeral. In the backyard, the horse-shaped tire swing swayed lopsided from the oak tree where he had hung it himself years ago. I couldn't even remember Kelci or I ever swinging on it though.

"Daddy? There you are," I said. It was still early, but he must have just come back from a morning run. 

"Hey sweetie," dad said. I kissed his sweaty cheek. 

"Can I get you some coffee?" I offered.

"No thanks." He pulled his earbuds out and wiped his face. Was he crying?

"I need to get back home," he said. He sucked his cheeks in like he had just taken a bite of something sour. 

"I know." I wish he had more time, but I knew he had a life to get back to. 

"What are you going to do now?" Dad looked between me and Adrian, who joined us with two steaming cups of coffee. 

"Thanks, sweetie," I said to Adrian. I sipped the coffee slowly and watched a humming bird drink from the feeder above our heads. I had no idea what I was going to do anymore. My life had turned upside down in an instant, and I was still struggling to shake off the dizziness. 

"I'm sure you and Adrian will want to get back to your lives in New York," dad said. "I can take Kelci back with me to Louisiana."

Suddenly, Kelci stormed out onto the porch, scaring away the hummingbird. "I don't even know you. Why would I want to go live with you?" Her words were cold and sharp like the blade of a knife. She had been pretty well collected back in Los Angeles at the hospital, and even after mom died. But since returning home to Indiana, she was withdrawn and snappy. I'm sure it was another stage of grief, but being away from Remi didn't make it any easier. And then there was dad, whom she did not want anything to do with. 

"Kelci, I explained everything to you. Don't be angry with dad," I reminded her.

"I'm not angry. I'm just not going live with him." She leaned on the doorframe sipping from mom's favorite mug, the large white one with a black S printed on it. For the first time since the funeral, she wore regular clothes instead of sweatpants.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"Taylor is picking me up," she said. "And just so you know, her mom has offered me to stay with them. So, you can go back to your life in New York."

I flinched as though she actually slapped me. "First of all, my life is in Los Angeles. And so is yours."

"Not anymore." She could barely choke the words out. 

"What about your acting career? And Remi?"

"We should never have even been out there if mom was still sick." Kelci's eyes teared up. She shook her head, raising her hand to indicate she couldn't bear to talk about it.

"Cassidy told me you booked the pilot," I said, ducking my head to force Kelci to make eye contact. "You're not seriously going to give that up, are you?"

"I can't work without a guardian on set." Kelci's eyes squinted cynically. "What? You gonna sign up for that?"

"Why not?" I said. Was there any other choice? I could not imaging letting Kelci give up on her dream now. It would crush her.

"Really?" Kelci said. "Can she do that? I mean legally?" She turned to Adrian for confirmation.

"Technically, yes. Since your dad has been out of the picture for a while, he would have to prove himself a fit parent for the courts to force you to live with him." Adrian avoided eye contact with dad. "Your sister is your next closest relative, and can petition for guardianship, if she proves herself fit."