Catastrophic
Cover: 5/10
Description: 7/10
Grammar: 9/10
Style: 10/10
Plot: 9/10
Intrigue Factor: 8/10
48/60
I am a bit confused by your cover, I see that there is a person on it with their eyes covered by something but I don't know what was happening behind her. I could make out that there was some writing on it though and I recognised it as your title but it was very unclear and hard to figure out because the colour blended in a bit too much into the background image and was very small. I'm not sure if there is the authors name on it either as I couldn't make it out.
Your description is pretty good! I like how you have the quote at the start which presents the reader with suspense and makes them curious. After the quote you explained who the character who the quote was about was and I liked that you gave us some background info on Paige! After reading the first chapter (where you explained Paige's backstory and showed us a picture) I think that you could maybe have added a brief third paragraph that included the sentence you put at the end about her world falling apart, maybe something like this, just to add a bit more detail as it is a bit brief:
'Little did she know that all the decisions she made would lead her to where she is now, standing there watching her world burst into flames.'
I could find pretty much any grammar mistakes so well done, you also used very good vocabulary, great work! I love your writing style! I love that at the start of every chapter you write a quote which intrigues the reader and they want to read on to find out what it means. The way you have written has created strong imagery even thought the idea of Percy Jackson has been done before and I love it, well done!
I love the plot of your story. Although the Percy Jackson idea is not original and many other people in the world have based a story around it you have managed to create a great story so far. In the prologue I liked how you didn't just stick to the perspective of Paige you also gave us thoughts from other characters such as her father and Chiron. You have developed your characters very well so far and I can't wait to meet more of them as I am sure Paige will soon meet lots of other people at Camp Half-blood! Your story is very interesting and the little quotes at the top of every chapter adds to that, well done! I like that you haven't revealed everything straight away as well, like how Paige's mother died. I love your story, it's a great read and I honestly can't wait to see how it goes!
