MONDAY, FEBRUARY 3RD

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I'm still pretty bummed out over Carla's text message.

I really wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, but the magazine article wouldn't let me.

I planned to just pretend the whole Crazy Burger thing had never happened and TOTALLY ignore her.

However, when I arrived at school, the first thing I noticed was that ALL of the girls were acting really strange. Even the normally loud girls were huddled together in small groups, quietly talking among themselves

But mostly, everyone was staring nervously at some huge commotion down the hall.

WHAT was going on??! And WHERE were all the BOYS?!

Okay, this was just too . . . WEIRD.

While all of the girls stood there gawking, I decided to go down the hall and investigate . . .

OMG! I could NOT believe my eyes!!

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Sweetheart Dance
Guys Ask the Girls(or Boys for the gays)

FRIDAY, FEB 14TH
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"OKAY, GUYFRIENDS! THIS TIME WE GET TO ASK THE GIRLS! HOW COOL US THAT?!"

"I'M GOING TO DIE!"
"OMG!"
"WHO SHOULD I ASK?!"
"THIS IS SO EXCITING"

Practically every guy in the entire school was part of this huge crowd in line for tickets to the Sweetheart Dance.

Jerome, the boy who sits behind me in geometry, showed me his tickets and excitedly filled me in . . .

"Monty! This is the most popular dance of the year! But make sure you get your tickets soon because they usually sell out in a few days!"

He was right about the dance being really popular. The line was so long that it flowed past the office, wrapped around the corner near the library and extended beyond the cafeteria door. It looked like the entrance to a sold-out Against the Current concert! But get this . . .

IT WAS GUYS ASK THE GIRLS!

Of course, I totally FREAKED! Unfortunately, the ONLY girl I am even remotely interested in couldn't even stand to eat a burger with me😢!

I was so NOT asking her to some Sweetheart Dance!!

All of this gushy sweetheart stuff was getting on my last nerve. So I decided to go to my locker and vent in my diary before my first class.

But THAT was a really BAD idea!

Buggs had bedazzled his locker with so many sparkly pink and red hearts, it practically blinded me. Even his hair was dyed red and glittery!

HOW in the world was I supposed to write in my diary when all of HIS very tacky BLING-BLING was, um . . . BLING-BLINGING all over the place?!!

I couldn't believe what happened next. That boy wrinkled his nose and then sprayed his Pretty Poison designer perfume all over me, accidentally-on-purpose.

Like, WHO does that?! Finally, I just totally lost it.

"PLEASE, Buggs! Could you be more careful where you're spraying that stuff?"

"Sorry, Monty! It's just that your odour is especially pungent today. And I don't have a can of disinfectant spray."

"Personally. I'd prefer disinfectant. What's the name of that perfume you're wearing? Flea-'n'-Tick Repellent?" I shot back.

Calling Buggs a mean boy is an understatement. He's a shark in makeup, skinny jeans and cool-people-shoes.

Suddenly he turned around and got all up in my face like spot cream or something . . .

"So, Monty, are you going to the Sweetheart Dance? Oh, my bad! They don't admit animals!"

"Actually, Buggs, that stank you're smelling is not me. It's coming from your mouth. You're obviously suffering from a severe casr of BLABBER-ITIS! Is that stuff contagious?"

Buggs glared at me with his beady little eyes. "Admit it, Monty! You're just jealous because Carla liked the digital camera I gave him for his birthday A LOT better than YOUR stupid gift certificates to CRUDDY BURGER."

"It's not CRUDDY Burger. It's CRAZY Burger!" I said, wondering how he even knew about it. Had Carla told him we were going to Crazy Burger together to use her gift certificates?

"Whatever! Your gift was SO tacky! I got the camera so Carla can take pictures of me when I'm crowned Sweetheart Prince. And I've already asked her to the dance, so dont even think about it."

I just blinked my eyes in shock! Buggs had already asked Carla to the dance???!!!

Did she say YES or NO?!! Or MAYBE? He had very conveniently left out THAT little detail.

However, I had to admit, everything was starting to make perfect sense.

When Buggs had asked to talk to Carla in private at his birthday party, it was probably to invite her to the Sweetheart Dance!

And if they were going to the dance together, there was NO WAY he'd want her hanging out with ME at Crazy Burger.

So she sent me that text😦!

I closed my eyes, sighed deeply and bit my lip.

Then an unexpected wave of anger rushed over me .

Buggs is NOT the boss of me! It's a free country! I can ask WHOEVER I want to the dance.

And yes, Carla had just stood me up.

But STILL!

There was NO reason why I couldn't just totally HUMILIATE myself by ASKING her anyway.
Right?!

WRONG!! If Buggs and Carla want to be together, I'm NOT going to stand in their wa-

That's when Buggs rudely interrupted the deep conversation I was having with myself. "BTW, Monty, just a friendly little reminder! Make sure you vote ME for Swertheart Prince on February 14th! Everybody else is going to. I'm SOOO popular!" Buggs gushed.

He then flipped his hair and sashayed away. I just HATE it when that boy sashays!

I was really upset that Buggs was trying to undermine my friendship with Carla. AGAIN!

What if I asked her to the dance too?! Then she'd be forced to choose!

TWO desperate guys and ONE girl! Just GREAT😔!

Of course, this left me with one very obvious and compelling question.

WHY in the world would Buggs ask ME to vote for HIM for Sweetheart Prince when it's so obvious he HATES my guts?!

All of this is mind-boggling! And my mind is so BOGGLED, I seriously need to talk to my BFF's, Teddy and Felix.

They were the ONLY other guys in the entire school whose brains did NOT turn into MUSH today from Sweetheart FEVER!!

I'm already SICK of Valentine's Day, and it's still two weeks away!

😢!

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