The whims of her bewildered heart.

Chapter nineteen

"Assalamu Alaikum" I greeted as I walked into the kitchen my throat burning from the throwing up that I have been doing for the past few days.

"Walaikum salam" Mum and dad greeted.

I poured myself a glass of juice and forced it into me.

"You look pale" dad commented as he ate his sandwich.

"I do?" I asked sipping on my juice ignoring the heart burns.

"She doesn't eat much, I'm taking her today to the doctor" Mum replied sitting next to dad.

"I'm fine Mum" I spoke but she ignored.

Finishing off my juice, I left to school for a long day ahead.

"Make sure to complete the essay for homework" I yelled as the class dispersed.

I felt a little better than how I felt at home so I decided to stay back in school to watch over the kids decorate the gym room for the anniversary party and also to avoid mums appointment t0 the doctor.

I marked papers whilst supervising the kids and watched Hamza walking with balloons, he saw me and waved frantically and I waved back.

"Aisha!" He exclaimed as he neared me.

"Hey baby" I said ruffling his hair.

"I didn't know you were a part of the deco team" I spoke and he grinned.

"I asked mum and signed up. It's fun" he replied.

"Nice" I said.

He then pulled me with him to help him decorate and I did so helping them put up the balloons and banners.

After almost two hours the gym was set for the next day and slowly the kids started leaving.

I took all my stuff and packed them in my bag when Hamza pulled my abaya.

"What's up baby?" I asked raising my eyebrows.

"Can we get donuts? Please!" He asked looking at me with puppy dogs eyes.

"Umm.." I put on a thinking face and he pouts.

"Okay" I laughed ruffling his hair.

I held Hamza's hands as we walked to the nearest crosstown.

I quickly sent a text to Sara informing her that I was taking Hamza over to crosstown before she gets worried that he is not at school.

I held the door for Hamza, who walked inside excitedly. My phone pinged indicating a message from Sara who had responded with an okay.

"Hey there" I smiled at the cashier who smiled back.

"What would you guys like?" She asked smiling at Hamza.

"I'd like a sugar dipped donut and a cappuccino please" I replied and looked at Hamza who was scrutinizing the donuts.

"Hamza, baby what would you like?" I asked him.

He tore his gaze from the donuts and stared at me for a while before turning to the cashier and placing his order.

We sat closer to the glass window and waited for our order.

Hamza kept talking about his friends and school while looking side ways time to time for his donuts.

Finally when it arrived he immediately began eating it covering his mouth with chocolate. I took small bites of donuts feeling a little uneasy. With almost so much hard work I finished the donut and my coffee.

"Finish?" I looked over at Hamza who nodded munching the last bit of his donut.

"Uncle im!" Then Hamza exclaimed.

I froze on my seat, we have not been seeing each other after talha's aqeeqah dinner and I was relived at that but as Hamza ran towards him, I had no other option than to stand up and look their way.

Hamza was holding onto Imran who was ruffling his hair, he was talking to someone on the phone with the other hand. He had his shades on his head and it pulled back a few of his hair. His gaze met mind and I could tell that he froze, he wasn't talking but instead he kept looking. I looked away as he kept looking.

I waved at Hamza who ran towards me. I hugged him and kissed him on his cheek.

"Come home soon okay?" I told as I kissed him again.

"Love you!'' Hamza said as he kissed my cheek.

"You too baby" I replied and with that I stood up and reached the door followed by Hamza and Imran.

"How are you going?'' He asked as we walked outside.

"I'll get a taxi" I replied looking for one on the road.

"Let me drop you" he said putting his shades on and it churned my stomach.

"No, it's fine. I can go by myself'' I said adjusting my bag on my shoulders.

"Get in the car" he replied with a sigh and I shook my head.

"Please. I can just get myself a taxi. You can go" I said.

I walked away from where he stood looking for a taxi, I saw him help Hamza into the car and shut the door. He looked my way and stood like that, I ignored his gaze on me and walked a little farther looking for a taxi and within few minutes the car zoomed off passing me.

The sun was almost setting and almost thirty minutes passed as I stood there and I became agitated. I couldn't get a taxi and my knees were giving in.

Suddenly a pain shot through my abdomen and I flinched holding it. My knees wobbled and I gasped as I felt suffocated. I got down to my knees and took deep breaths, I held my self together as the pain worsened as time passed. I dropped my bag of my shoulder and with trembling hands looked for my pills. I dropped all the stuff I had on the ground and looked but I couldn't find it. My vision started to blur and I felt I was trapped and there was no air surrounding me.

Finally after several attempts, I get my pills and drop all of them as a car honks. I flinch as the light hits my face.

"Aisha?" His voice came.

I turned towards his direction and I saw concern all over his face, he had his hands on his jean pocket and the other on his phone and for a moment the pain all stopped and I stared at him and the within seconds I felt a excruciating pain on my spine then I puke.

I puke blood.