The whims of her bewildered heart.

Chapter twenty five

When I reached the living room, I noticed that I was shaking. I took my seat beside ilham and smiled weakly towards Sara and kulthom.

"Took you long enough" Ilham muttered under her breath.

I looked at her and I knew that she knew something was up.

"You Alright? You look..feeble" Sara spoke looking at me with worried eyes.

"Oh! I'm perfectly fine. It's nothing" I waved my hand laughing awkwardly.

Although Sara did not believe me she let it slide and continued her conversation with kulthom.

"Where's talha?" I asked to no one in particular.

"Your brother took him" Kulthom replied and continued into the conversation.

"What happen?" Ilham asked in a slight whisper.

"Not now" I mumbled still shaking.

Ilham passed me and nod and joined the conversation of the other two.

"Okay spill" Ilham spoke.

"Where do I start?" I asked switching off the lights of my room.

"From the beginning of you going to wash off your abaya" she said.

And then I filled her in. Filled in about what had happened and what he had told me.

"You are soo dumb!" Ilham exclaimed as I finished.

besides her Imaad groaned and she quickly mumbled an apology.

"You said 'you'll get over it' when he freaking told you he loves you?" She asked disbelief evident in her tone.

"Yes" I said softly.

"Babe I'm sorry but I can't help it" Ilham whispered and then yelled.

"You pig!" She exclaimed and I flinched.

I listened to her yell patiently just as imaad was doing from beside her and finally when she shut her mouth. I heard imaad sigh and so did I.

"Are you okay?" She then asked in a whisper.

"I don't know" i sighed playing with my hair.

"What to do you mean?" She asked.

"It's like, My mind froze, I didn't know what I was saying or anything. I just blurted it out" I said.

"I honestly don't know what to say" she spoke after a few minutes of silence.

"You know what! You need sleep it's almost two am. I'm fine and I'm tired I need some sleep" I said and with that the two of us hung up although I knew she was aware that sleep was far from close to me.

I walked towards my balcony and watched the night sky and somehow it brought me peace.

I sat there for hours, contemplating about what was running in my mind. It was when the dawn emerged from the darkness that I retreated back into my room.

I took my phone and looked him up on Instagram and when I did, I knew there was no going back I pressed message and typed it.

And with that I knew there was no going back.

I only slept after I had prayed fajr and woke up by three in the afternoon when mum came in the hundredth time to check up on me.

"I told you, you'd get tired" she spoke running her hands through my hair.

I opened my eyes and shut them again and hugged her close.

"Mum, there's nothing tiring in attending a dinner" I mumbled.

"So care to tell me why you are sleeping until this time?" She questioned her hands on my cheek now.

"Nothing" I replied ignoring the butterflies that erupted.

"Ya?" She questioned and I nodded.

"You missed luhr" she said with raised eyebrows and I sat up straight.

"I couldn't sleep last night" I replied and she gave me a concerned look.

"Are you okay?" She asked her hands on my cheek. "Do you wanna go to the doctor?"

"No! I'm fine. It's just that I've been sleeping all day yesterday so I couldn't at night" I lied and she nodded although she didn't believe it.

"Are you taking your medicine right?" She asked and I nodded, tying my hair up.

"Maybe I should start giving them to you" she informed.

"Mum! I'm not a kid I can take my medicines on my own" I whined.

"You are my kid" she protested placing a kiss on cheek.

With that she left my room asking me to be down after praying.

I showered and changed into some pjs and left my room as my stomach grumbled.

Mum served me some food and placed a juice beside me. I gobbled it all up and sat on the living room browsing through the tv.

My pinged with messages from Ilham and I replied to them and set my phone on the table as I watched the crazy rich Asians.

Then mid way through the movies my phone vibrated. I debated if I should see or ignore but then eventually decided to see what Ilham would have sent.

My hands froze as I saw who it was from and butterflies erupted on my stomach as I opened my phone.

Staring at the message nothing felt more heartbreaking than that one word