Addicted To You

11

I stand outside the hallway waiting for Intro to Lit to start. I set my alarm for an earlier time the night before to be the first one there. Sadly I still haven't been able to sleep that well. Along with making things worse with Nolan and Claudia. They had been calling me, but I didn't know how to bring myself to answer. It would've all been one lie after another. 

I bring the phone close to my ear and call Claudia.

Just breathe, I try to tell myself.

"Hello?" I hear her sweet voice from the phone. 

"Hey," 

"Where have you been? We have been calling you for days. Are you ok?"  

Am I ok? 

Yes, I am.

I think. My self conscious speaks.  

 "I'm fine, I just. . . I . . . lost my phone on campus, and I found it in the lost and found this morning." I lie once again. It was well-needed. 

"Ok, as long as you're safe. How do you like your classes so far?" 

"So far, the three classes I have, besides math, haven't been that hard." 

"So now you know what you have to study more." I hear her yawn. "You should call 'Chase' he's been worried about you." 

Did she say his name, or was it all in my head? "Who?" I questioned. 

"Nolan, I said he's worried about you." 

A heavy load of weight comes off my shoulders. "Yeah, I will. I've just been busy." 

"It only takes two minutes out of your day to call your boyfriend once. He misses you." I can hear her doing stuff in the background. "Oh, and Doctor Gonzales contacted me. She strongly encourages you to schedule a session."

"I'm going to call him now." I roll my eyes. "And I'll call her too." I lie. I don't need therapy for the rest of my life. I mourned my mother's death and moved on like I was supposed to.

I love that Claudia cares about my relationship with Nolan, sometimes she cares too much, and I instantly feel like it's a relationship of three instead of just me and Nolan.  

"Ok, good. I love you, and study hard." We end the conversation at that and hang up. I will have to call Nolan after class, now is not the time. 

I notice Trevor approaching me,  "Hey, you look like you haven't slept in days."  

I smile and wave. "Because I haven't." 

"What happened." He scans my exhausted face. 

"Chase is what happened." If I had to tell anyone about it, it would be Trevor. I do not know why I feel like I can trust him. 

His expression is dull. "What did he do." 

"He kissed me," I whisper while looking around to make sure no one hears. 

His mouth drops in shock. "I swear someone needs to kick him out of this school for good. It'll do everyone a favor." He grunts. 

"I don't know what to say to Nolan, he's supposed to be coming this weekend to see me, and Trixi is throwing a party at the apartment." 

"Don't take him to the Apartment then, take him across New York, or you can bring him to my house. My family is having this little dinner party. So you guys can stop by." 

"That sounds fun, but I don't think a dinner party is what we need right now. I think I'm just going to tell him not to come." I sigh. I want to see him, I do, but it is just not the right time