Falling ♡ Timothée Chalamet

05 - surprise

Coming home after work and finding that my fathers car was surprisingly not parked in the driveway I immediately let out a deep sigh of relief.

Today started out horrible but it ended on a good note, once again due to Timothée's ability to make everything seem okay again. He brightens up everything he touches and every room he enters and I'm happy I have him back in my life again but I regret ever drifting apart from him in the first place.

I get inside and I make my way up to my room, struggling a bit more due to the added pain I felt in my leg when I fell on my way home earlier. But somehow I still manage to make it to the top in one piece and I find the door to my bedroom cracked open.

I wanted to go back down the stairs and out the door, and maybe if I didn't have a cast on I would have done exactly that. But right now, I really had no choice but to face my fears. I always leave my door shut and the lights off whenever I leave the house. It's a part of my routine therefore, seeing it open and the lights on, I had a huge feeling my father was in there.

Maybe he was so drunk that he walked home instead of driving and maybe he was sitting on my bed ready to yell at me because of some stupid reason that his messed up mind has come up with.

Like maybe today he was mad at me for being unorganized and not cleaning my room. Or maybe I'm going to get another beating because I was working too much and I needed to be back home instead. I don't know what it's going to be tonight but I know I sure as hell do not want to find out.

I enter my room, trembling and scared and instead of finding my angry father with a drink in his hand, I find my brother Aaron slumped down on my bed with a picture frame in his hands.

My picture frame.

It was the picture I had on my nightstand of my mother and I before she passed away. I always stared at it and studied it to convince myself she was real. That she wasn't just some creation of mine to bring me closure or peace. That she existed. And seeing it in my brother's hand's made my blood boil. 'Hey, you're finally home.' Aaron smiles, and he says this like I've been out for a few hours and I just came back.

He doesn't signify in his tone that it has been an entire year since we last saw each other and that he never said goodbye to me before he left.

I watch him smile down at the photo with a very sad look on his face. 'I always loved this photo, I have a smaller version of it in my wallet. She looks so happy and so do yo-'

'What the hell are you doing back here?!' I'm not going to play nice. I'm not going to act like I missed him, I didn't. I don't miss him. I'm not going to pull him in a hug and welcome him back. I spent the last year hating his guts. He left me with dad, with our fucking monster of a father and now he's back and he's telling me he carries a photo of me and our mom in his wallet?

Who says that? After disappearing for a year?

Aaron looks up at me and he seems offended by my bluntness. 'Why do you sound so angry?' he asks putting the photo back on my nightstand.

I can't help but roll my eyes at him. 'Are you really asking me that right now?' The anger, it's coming back, it's coming back so fast. Just like it came last night, just like it did at the diner today when I was mad at Sam.

I need to calm down.

But I hate him. I fucking hate him. He left me here.

He goes silent for a moment, trying to think of what to say to me. It had been a year since we had last conversed with each other, so he probably forgot how to talk to me or to get through to me. And I don't blame him for struggling. I'm really hard to crack, especially when I'm mad.