Troubled Youth [Poem Collection]

Remember

I remember the time when I was young
Without a fear in my bones
Without a care about the world
I was young and innocent to everything
The sins of this earth, I was oblivious to.

I remember how I played with my toys
I created worlds out of my imagination.
Fantasies became my reality.
Towers that reach the moon seemed possible
Lava on the floor seemed plausible
Creativity stemming from my brain,
Twisted into a vast dimension that only I could see.

I miss those days where I was helpless
I was taken cared off.
Watched 24/7.
My safety was their top priority.
My health was their concern.
The wonders of the Earth all lied in my room
I needed nothing else but endless fun
I needed nothing more but the love of my parents.

But all that ended with age.
I grew up and with that came responsibility.
Health was my concern.
My safety was my top priority.

I was aware of the evilness of this earth.
I cared for money to sustain my life
Love was a constant conflict; whether I was gay or straight.
Recently a friend's death sent me spiraling.
In hole I have yet to fully come out of.

I'm learning from my mistakes, but I make them everyday.
I breathe and live for the sake of my family & friends.
Because I've succumbed to depression and wonder if death is the only way to eternal happiness.

Those days where I was young are gone.
My memories are the only thing keeping them alive.
But as I get older they fade away.
Replaced by the new ones, the ones where happiness is a word without meaning.

Take my back to the days while I still remember them.
Before I forget.
So I don't live a life of sadness, distrust, loneliness & regret.
Or moved on into the afterlife without a dream or anyone to remember by.