13 Reasons Why// Winterwatcher (Discontinued)

{22} Tape

I had a dream

I got everything I wanted

Not what you'd think

And if I'm being honest

It might've been a nightmare

~

Winter

He fell halfway down the tree. Trembling, he got up. A pain shot through his ankle, but he barely felt it.

And then he was walking. To anywhere. It didn't matter. It never had mattered.

And he felt miserable. Not that he thought about it, he had always envied Moon's house. Every time he came to work on a science project, he had envied her.

My first memory. Someone's house.

The warm, cozy house. The biggest room was as twice as small as his bathroom, but he envied her. Whenever he saw Secretkeeper, he felt so happy. She seemed like what a real mom would be: warm, supportive, and funny. And so much more.

Every time he went home, he felt horribleand hated himself that he thought of his parents that way. It was simply disrespectful, but every time he went to Moon's house, he couldn't help it. He would have traded anything to have a family like hers.

But he knew now.

It was warm because it was full of love. Secretkeeper's love for Moon, Moon's love for her mother.

Happiness isn't where you are. Happiness is who you're with.

He blinked, trying to think of a place that made him happy.

Home? He didn't have a home. It was never a home. He could tell from the nightmares.

Memories.

He tried to think. He wanted his memories back, desperately.

He began to tremble in cold.

I can't go anywhere, he thought. But he kept stepping. He kept moving.

He saw a row of houses, and he narrowed his eyes. I've been here before.

Even though he didn't know where it was, his body did and it took a step towards one. It was like a habit.

His eyes began to close. And he realized he was tired. Terribly tired. Tired of being himself, tired of not knowing anything.

When was the last time I slept?

He saw people. They formed a circle around him, sneering and smirking.

Moon was with them.

The one with red hair. He had seen her in the room. When he went to the school. She was crying, he remembered.

Her hair, fiery and scarlet.

He felt a jolt. That was her name. Scarlet. Scarlet...Sky.

Then the one named Qibli. And next to him, Umber.

He turned and faced her. Moonwatcher. She was smirking.

Nobody in their right mind would ever, ever love you.

He felt a jolt of pain in his heart, and he turned away, gripping his head. "Stop!" He shouted.

When he opened his eyes, he saw a woman.

A woman with icy, cold blue eyes. The one he saw in the mirror every day. He screamed, and she gave him a look of disappointment.

He jolted awake. He had collapsed on somebody's doorstep.