Mrs All American||A.I

Chapter 20 ~Broken heart~

I walked into my old decent sized room. It looked the same as i left it. The walls were still red and the clothes that i didnt take were still on the ground. I pushed them to the side with my foot then put my bag on the ground. I sat on my made bed, the only thing in my room that was fixed.

I looked around my room and saw all these pictures i had of me, my friends, family, memories. I then remembered about that picture Luke took of me and ashton laughing together. I dug through my bag until i found the picture. I looked at it. I looked happy. Happier than i ever was in my life. I stood up still looking at the picture to the wall with my photos. I clipped it on the line before standing back and looking at them all.

Tears started running down my face again. I shook my head trying to wipe away the memories of me and ashton swimming through my head. I plugged my phone to my speaker and let the sound of when the darkness comes by colbie caillat.

"Be here waiting, hoping, praying, that this light will guide you home. When your feeling lost ,i'll leave my heart hidden in the sun, for when the darkness comes " I sand in unison while crying and pacing back and forth in my room. All the memories of me and ashton came flooding.

Me bumping into ashton on my way back home, ashton and me swimming together in that river, then came the time that i saw the engagement ring and my whole life fell apart. I could feel my tears become heavier by now. The memory of ashton asking Sydney to marry him, me kissing him and me crying myself to sleep everyday, thinking about whether or not to self harm or not. To just take a razor and cut my wrists to let out all my anger.

By now my crying was so bad i felt like i lost control. I paced around faster breathing fast, pulling my hair, punching the wall. I walked into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. My makeup was all messed up and smudged. I looked at the sink only to see a pack of razors. I gently took one out the box and looked at my wrists.

I placed the razor on my wrist and left it there. I was deciding on whether or not to do it. My phone rang. I looked at the caller id and it was ashton. I didn't pick it up. I just stared at my phone. Once the ringing stopped i got a voicemail from him. I swiped on the notification making the voicemail play.
"Uh hey... Eva? Ev's. I just...i miss you...a lot. Can u please call me? I uh... I love you." The voicemail stopped playing. This broke me. I slit my wrist with the razon making a trail of blood fall down my hand.

I put my head down on the sink and started crying. I fell to the floor and just stayed there. I don't know what to do anymore with my life.

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It was a friday night and its been one month since ive seen the boys. My wrist is currently filled with 5 scars. Not as big as the first one though. Tomorrow was Ashton's wedding and i was still here in colorado. I was on my way back home from the supermarket and the road was empty. It was currently 10pm around the time when barely anyone is out driving.

It was as quiet as i remembered it to be which i hated. I decided to turn on the radio.
"We're here with the boys of 5 Seconds of Summer"

"Hi" the boys said in unison. My heart stopped beating.

"So you just released your new song. Amnesia right?"

"Yea" Lukes voice pierced through me.

"How bout we hear it?"

"Yeah sure" Michael said. What sounded like Luke's strumming filled my car.

"I drove by all the places we just to hang out getting wasted. I thought about our last kiss how it felt the way you tasted. And even though your friends tell me you doing fine. Are you somewhere feeling lonely even though he's right beside you. When he says those words that hurt you, do you read the ones i wrote you. Sometimes i start to wonder was it just a lie. If what we had was real, how could you be fine. Cuz I'm not fine at all" Calum's voice echoed through the car and Luke's voice began to fill the car instead.

"I remember the day you told me you were leaving. I remember the makeup running down your face. And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them, like every single wish we ever made." I then realized this is the song i sang to Lauren. The song i made up out of the blue. The song about ashton i only knew the chorus to. They finished it. I don't even know how they got the song. Lauren wouldn't say cuz she knows my feelings for ashton and respects that. I was so confused.

"I wish that i could wake up with amnesia, and forget about the stupid little things. Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you, and the memories i never can escape. Cuz I'm not fine at all" Ashton's voice echoed through the background with Luke's. I parked the car in front of the house and stayed in the car. Tears began to run down my face again and i couldn't control them. I waited till the song ended.

"That...was beautiful" the radio producer told the boys

"Thanks" Calum said

"How did you guys come up with this? Its so deep it just feels real. As if you guys actually experienced this"

"Oh well Ashton wrote the song" Luke said. I could already feel the tension grow.

"Well ashton did you experience this before?" Everyone kept quiet.

"Well?"

"Yes"

"REALLY?"

"Ashton" i heard Luke whisper to him. He wasn't that good at whispering so i wasn't surprised i was able to hear that.

"Im getting married tomorrow and I'm just not sure if its the best thing to say who"- i shut the car off. I punched the steering wheel and let all my tears fall down my face without force. I lost ashton. It was over.
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"Eva..Eva...EVA!" I woke up to the sound of someone calling my name. I sat up and rubbed my eyes. I stretched before opening my eyes. I looked at my hands only to see them smudged with makeup. I cried myself to sleep again. I looked up to see who it was. I could just baerly make out the figure. It looked like...

"LUKE!" I flung myself on him not caring how i looked liked.

"Hey" he laughed.

"What are you doing here?" I furrowed my eyebrows in question. Luke showed the hand he was hiding behind his back. He was holding a black bag, the ones where you would out clothes. I raised an eyebrow in question.

"I know you dont want to but your gonna have to" luke unziped the bag revealing the maid of honors dress that i saw at the store and took a picture and sent it to him. I began crying.

"Luke"

"Hey. Get dressed. We're going whether you like it or not"

"What if i refuse to wear the dress?"

"I'll put it on you myself...and I'm serious" he gave me a serious glare. He exited my room and i looked at the dress. A smile crept on my face and ran into the bathroom to take a shower.
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GUYSSSS! THE BOOK IS ALMOST DONE😭😭😭😭!!! BLAHHHH!! NOOO!! I was crying during this whole thing cuz i was listening to when darkness comes and to not about angels again and again. About angels just kept teminding me of gus and i just wanted to cry cuz omg😭GUSSSS!! ok so...im sad now😞

Dedicated to my bae😏
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Bae is chiken btw (i know how to spell chicken i just like spelling it without the c. Idk why)