My Mate is a Crazy Cat Lady {Namjoonxreader}

Chapter 38: Full Moon Part 5

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I really want to ask him. If I fell in the toilet, would he annihilate it?

This is only one of the questions that have gone through my mind since I entered this room.

This is Namjoon I'm talking to...but it's not. It's hard to properly wrap my head around it in a way that I can understand. I get it. There's Namjoon, and there's Fluffy. They're the same person, but on different sides of a coin.

But. I'm looking at Namjoon, doing Namjoon things and he says his name is Fluffy but he also does Fluffy things. I think naming him made things more complicated. My brain is not built well enough to understand this shit. Or maybe I'm just really sleepy.

The past three days BooBoo has eaten less and slept more. He's still not grooming himself and once he didn't even bother to walk all the way to the litter box, choosing instead to drop a deuce halfway there. I think he's lost more weight, but I can't be absolutely sure of that. I feel like I'm on the edge of a cliff and there's an inevitability that I'll fall over, but the closer I get to that tipping point, the more desperately I cling on.

He's ok. He's going to be fine. He's old but he's healthy. He probably has a cold or something and he's temporarily under the weather.

At least I have my friends. They spent all day trying to distract me, and for the most part, it worked. Granny stayed home and cared for my elderly cat, sending me hourly updates in the form of her holding the phone up to BooBoo so I could hear him purring into the speaker. She understands me.

When I got here I was nervous. It's Namjoon, but it's Fluffy. So it was almost like I was going to be spending the night with someone other than my boyfriend. I guess I've come to think of them as different people, when in reality they're the same person.

Except that Namjoon has never said he loves me. I don't think he's there yet, and I can say the same about myself. Fluffy, however, is obviously there and isn't budging from that stance.

That's...ok, I guess? I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it. Flattered? Absolutely. Of course it's nice to know you're loved. Namjoon has always made me feel special. He listens to me and takes care of me and puts up with my weird ass without complaint. I feel like I fall short of being the same level girlfriend as he is boyfriend. It's kind of hard to keep up when he's so damn perfect.

What the hell is this marking thing about, though? And, is that just Fluffy talking or does Namjoon feel the same?

I know I feel some type of way about wanting him to bite me, and vice versa. The thing I take issue with is, "It's how I can show everyone else you're mine."

What does this wolf not understand about I'm mine?

I'm mine.

It's not that hard of a concept.

Besides that, it makes me uncomfortable. Like, he wants me to walk around with a bite mark on my neck like some sort of trophy he won at a pie eating contest?

I don't even like pie.

Bitch, it's cake all the way. Don't even come at me with that weak pie shit.

I'm not his trophy and I'm not his pie. I'm his mate. We're in a relationship and a relationship means we're partners who support and care for each other, not that one owns the other. Namjoon says to read the book to understand it and I will read it, though I can't imagine I would ever be open to this.

Whatever. Right now I have to pee and Namjoon—or Fluffy—is being super weird. Did he really expect me to go in the trashcan? Honestly, I'd rather die, but this is something I can relentlessly tease Namjoon about later.