The hand.

Chapter twenty five

I slept in Zac's room last night so I could be sure he wouldn't hurt himself. The floor is very uncomfortable but at least I know he's safe.

I barely got any sleep anyway, my thoughts kept me awake. I want to help him make friends so he won't feel so alone and I decided I could introduce him to my friends so he could get to know them.

It's now 11 am and he still isn't up. I sipped on my coffee and looked out the window. I like looking out the window and watching the world go by.
It's raining which is something I would normally roll my eyes at but today it's quite soothing.

I finish my coffee and put the mug in the sink to wash up later. I get Zac's pills ready and fill a glass with water to take up to him. I need to wake him up now so I can go to work. Since I've met Zac, I've used up all of my sick days and have been late on most days that I do actually turn up. With Oliver's disappearance and the increase in the number of patients, I'm definitely needed.

I open the door to his room and put the glass and pills down on the bedside table. I'm about to gently shake him when I see his eyes flutter open. "Good morning, come on, you need to get up now so I can get to work" I tell him while getting up to open the curtains to let some light into the room.

"It's fine I'll stay here" he lays down and shuts his eyes.

"Absolutely no way! Not after last night, you're coming with me" I demanded.

He groaned but got up. I handed him his pills and he looked at them in disgust.
"I don't want them" he said and pushed my hand with the pills away.
"You have to take them, it's for your own good" I said sternly.

"I said I don't want them!" He raised his voice a little.

"I'm not giving you a choice"

He looked scared but he took them.

"Now get dressed, we have to get going."

I left the room and went downstairs to wait for him.

I may have been a bit snappy towards him but I blame the lack of sleep. I'll apologise later.

After waiting for half an hour and explaining to my boss on the phone why I'm late again, I gave up waiting and went upstairs to see what's taking him so long.

"Zac? What's taking so long? I'm late!" I shouted through the door.

"I don't wanna go!" He yelled back. I'm loosing my patience right now.
"You're coming with me whether you want to or not, are you dressed?"
He sighed before mumbling a yes.

I pushed the door open and stormed over to him. I grabbed his arm and pulled him up, dragging him to the door. "I'm not leaving you by yourself, you're coming with me." I said angrily.

___________________

The car ride to work was completely silent with Zac giving me the silent treatment.

I know he's upset with me but I'm not feeling too happy with him either.

Last night was absolutely terrifying. I've had patients do a lot worse, he's not the first of my patients to try and end their life, I've even had a patient try to end the life of another doctor but I've developed feelings for Zac, I'm certain of it.

I care about all my patients but Zac is special. However I don't think I'll be admitting my feelings anytime soon. Firstly, he's my patient and it would be very wrong for us to be together. Secondly, there's no chance the relationship would work, he's still unstable. And as for the last reason, well who's to say he feels the same way?

When we finally got there I practically leaped out of the car.

Zac stayed in my office as usual while I went around to see my patients.

Nadia Banks was the last one.
I don't know why but she seems a bit off. She was diagnosed with bipolar but since she's been here, she hasn't shown any symptoms.

Another thing I found strange was that she kept asking personal questions. It almost felt like I was being interviewed.

I put the files back and made my way to my room. I'm exhausted, I really need a night to relax.

I opened the door and went to grab my things. "Alright, come on we can go now" I said, not looking up. There was no answer. "Zac I know you're upset but-" I cut myself off when I looked up. He's not here.
I ran out of the room in a panic.
I was in such a state, I wasn't looking where I was going and bumped into someone.

I didn't even look up to see who it was, I just mumbled a sorry and ran. I was stopped when a hand grabbed my wrist and I looked up to see it was my boss.

"Hey what's wrong with you?" He asked with a look of concern on his face.

"Have you seen Zac?" I asked, trying to pull myself together.

"No I'm sorry darling, maybe he went home."
Yes, that could be it. Maybe he went home. I quickly thanked my boss and ran out to my car, not even bothering to sign out. If he's at home, I just hope he won't repeat last night.

I drove home so fast, I definitely broke the speed limit.

I jumped out of my car and ran to the door, unlocking it. I ran straight up to his room, and pushed the door open to see it was empty. I ran to the bathroom and looked in there but that was empty too.

'Think Aubrey, THINK!'

The storage room! That's where he went last time when I thought he ran away.

I rushed to the storage room and opened the door. He wasn't in there! I frantically ran around the house looking absolutely everywhere but it eventually became clear to me that he wasn't here.

I dropped down on the couch in exhaustion. I felt a tear rush down my cheek and fall onto my hand. I didn't wipe it away, what's the point?
It was followed by another, and another until the tears were just pouring out.