Always ☼ Bellamy Blake [1]

Chapter 43: I Can't Love You

Sawyer cried out as Kane pulled her through the tunnel. "We gotta get you to Abby" Kane said as he placed the girl down on the floor. He closed up the secret panel 

"It hurts" Sawyer sobbed as Kane lifted her up. "I got you" Kane comforted as he ran through the red tarp

"What happened to her!" Miller yelled as he ran into a running Kane with Sawyer in his arms. "We need to get her to medical" Kane responds. Miller pulls out his radio and yells "We need a medic! Abby!" 

"Miller what's wrong?" Abby asks "It's Sawyer" Miller responds

Sawyer couldn't speak, she was in too much pain. Abby came sprinting down the hall, Jackson and Sawyer's father Chris behind her 

"What happened?" Abby yells as she drops down next to Kane who held the girl. "We need to get her to the med bay" 

Sawyer's eyes closed as she became unconscious. The pain sent her body into a shock which sent her mind into overdrive 

~

Sawyer's eyes opened, she was in the med bay laying in a bed. She looked down to see her top off and pants. She had no brace on either, her head turns to her am that was connected to an IV. Sawyer gulped as she looked at the IV bag 

There was pain medication flowing into her veins. She could tell, her body was numb. The curtains were being pushed making Sawyer turn her head

In came Bellamy making Sawyer furrow her brows in confusion as he stepped in. Bellamy turned around and closed the curtain before turning back 

"Hey" Bellamy said lowly, Sawyer didn't respond she just held a blank stare. "How are you feeling?" Bellamy asked "Like shit" Sawyer responds sitting up. She groans in pain and Bellamy moves to her side 

"You were with her weren't you?" Bellamy asks, Sawyer knew he was talking about Octavia. She nods 

Bellamy looked at the girl. Her eye was red from a broken blood clot, her face was bruised up. "Pike doesn't know" Bellamy says looking down "No one does" he continued

"How many casualties?" Sawyer asks "2, Monroe-" Sawyer gasps, she covered her mouth to stop a cry. Monroe had been part of the original hundred. The girl was dedicated and a great fighter. "I'm sorry" Sawyer cries. "I tried to warn you-" 

"I know, I know" Bellamy says as he leans forward and pulls the girl into his arms. "I can't" Sawyer said becoming serious. Bellamy let's go of her and sits on her bed "I can't let you just hug me and I can't let myself think that everything between us is ok again" Sawyer cried 

"I need to know, why you've changed" Sawyer says looking down, she fiddled with the blanket on her lap. "When I thought I lost you, I was filled with this- this um, this anger" Bellamy says "This anger towards the grounders, this anger towards myself" 

Sawyer listened as tears fell down Bellamy's face. "Why yourself?" Sawyer asks "Because the grounders didn't make you stay there, I did. That was on me, you were there because of me" Bellamy explains tears fell from the girl's cheeks

"Bell, you can't hold that guilt" 

"But it's not misplaced, it's my fault. And I thought the only way to get back at the world and to release this anger was to take it out on the people who hurt you-" 

"Bell, Ice Nation hurt me not the grounder army that camped a mile from here, to protect us" 

"All grounders are the same, they're all raised the same. All taught the same" Bellamy argues. Sawyer stares at her boyfriend in disbelief at his change of views "You're beginning to sound like him" Sawyer says referring to Pike