Cold Hearted Bastard

Chapter 28

He reached out a hand in my direction. I crawled closer to him, taking it into mine. He hoisted me up and onto his lap, enveloping me in a hug. "Don't you dare ever think it was your fault, Tostitos. If I ever see that mother fucker I swear I'll kill him."

His jaw ticked as he said that, anger enlightening within him.

"I feel like I can't breathe in their presence. It triggers something deep inside of me that I just don't exactly know how to deal with. I want to be able to be in the same room as them but for some reason, I can't stand it. The walls close in on me and I feel like I'm suffocating."

I welcomed his silence, thankful that he didn't say anything further on the subject. He eventually got up from the floor with me still in his arms and gently rested me on the bed. One stroke of my hair from him was all the reassurance I needed as he climbed under the comforter and next to me. Pulling me closer to him, he kissed the top of my head and mumbled what I made out as a thank you. Soon after, I fell asleep to his soft snores.

When I woke up, the space beside me was empty and cold. I was still in Aspen's room unsure of the time of day and prayed that my father hadn't looked for me for the morning yet.

Hastily, I threw on my clothes and tiptoed out of the room and up to mine, thankfully not seeing any sight of a single soul.

I grabbed my phone from my bed, then cringing as I saw three missed calls from Maddy, three from Lilly, and one from a private number.

Dialing back Lilly, she answered on the first ring.

"Happy Birthday, my beautiful best friend!" I pulled the speaker away from my ear, my poor eardrum suffering in the process.

"Thanks, Lilly."

"Are you ready for tonight?"

Earlier in the week, we had decided that we'd celebrate my birthday small this year. I had reluctantly agreed that because it was also Halloween we'd go to Jimmy's in the night because it was the only decent pub in the whole town that remotely celebrated the night.

"I guess...but I'm still on the fence about you choosing my outfit," I replied uneasily.

"It's going to be great. If you see what I chose for you," she paused, "you're going to look drop-dead gorgeous!"

I cringed knowing I wasn't ready for what she'd show up with.

"But I'll be by you to get ready around four and then Chase will pick us up." She continued. In the back of my mind, I remembered the last time the three of us were together and frowned. My friends, truthfully, had abandoned me when I needed them the most. If it wasn't for Aspen that night by Angelique's, I would have never been able to show my face in public again.

"Sure," I said, pushing the doubtful thoughts at the back of my mind.

She hung up and I threw my phone to the side of me while I fell back against the bed comforter. I couldn't help feeling a little down that Aspen hadn't been next to me when I woke up. Of course, he had no clue it was my birthday but still, I wish he had stayed.

For the next few hours, I kept myself preoccupied waiting around. Meredith and my dad had dragged me into the kitchen to wish me happy birthday and give me presents. One of the gifts had been a necklace with a stethoscope. I had to fake my excitement once I saw it because the truth was I couldn't hide the looming sensation in the pit of my stomach reminding me vaguely of disappointment.

Aspen didn't show up for any of it. I had hated myself for even looking but his motorcycle, usually parked up in the front of the house, was nowhere to be seen. I lounged around the house until we all cut a small cake and Lily showed up shortly after. When I had blown out the candles I found myself unsure of what to even wish for but still put on a fake smile as my dad had asked me if I wished for something good, I had nodded away from the lie.