It's Never Just Goodbye // Ed Sheeran

When You Say You Love Me

Alice

I was left with the house to clean today while Finley slept. Oscar stood over the couch and his fingers ran up the nape of my neck and into my hair. “I miss running my fingers through your hair.”

“Well,” I say. “I still have hair, Oscar.”

“It isn’t long anymore, babe. I miss how soft it used to be…” He said, bending down and whispering in my ear. His hot breath doing nothing but irritating me. He pressed his lips against my earlobe and I didn’t respond. Not even looking over my shoulder at him.

“Are you going to Kim’s wedding with me?” I asked him. Eyes on the laundry basket in front of me. He didn’t have any classes today or work. The two of us stuck in the apartment with no money to do anything and a sleeping baby.

“Probably not.”

“Why not?”

He falls on the couch after grabbing his bottled water. Resting his feet on the coffee table in front of him. “Your friends don’t like me and I don’t like them.”

“I cannot go to a wedding by myself, Oscar.”

“Why? It’s all your friends… It isn’t like a distant relative’s wedding.”

“Ed will be there…” I state. Trying to bug him. “Maybe I’ll just go with him.”

“So?”

“Aren’t you scared he’ll steal me away?” I say, glancing at him. It was a stupid remark, but I wouldn’t mind Oscar thinking about it. Especially if I think about it all the time after we bumped into each other at the market.

“He has a girlfriend.” He replies nonchalantly.

“How do you know?”

“Last time we saw him, Alice, he was with a girl and they kissed.” He took a sip of his water. Nothing seemed to bother him when it came to me.

I sighed, “Maybe they broke up.”

“Doubt it.”

“Shut up!”

He sat up and looked at me, “I just don’t get why the fuck you’re bringing him up. Just because he’s going to be there, doesn’t mean he wants to go with you.” He smirks, “Isn’t he the one who yelled for you to never call him again?”

“Isn’t he the one who fucking kicked your ass?”

“God, Alice! Why do have to bring that shit up? It’s like you know it bothers me and you like that!” he says. Eyes growing dark. “You’re sick, I swear.”

“I just want to go and have fun and obviously I can’t with my own fucking boyfriend!”

“Oh that’s real nice, Alice.” He said. Voice high. Frustration flooded through me. Another fight was brewing. That’s all it’s been lately. The two of us arguing until we both fall into different rooms, pissed off. “Make me feel like shit because your friends are idiots and I don’t want to go and cheer their fucking wedding on!”

“My friends are not idiots!”

“Yes they are! All of them are always drinking and partying. None of them have a real life! They only care about classic high school drama.” I’m close to slapping him. “Kim calls you on a daily basis almost to start shit!”

“Just because they don’t sit in the house and read American literature all day doesn’t mean shit, Oscar.”  I say. “It doesn’t mean they are illiterate.”