Desperate for you

Chapter 18

Chelsea POV
After seeing Dylan in this state, I started to feel pitiful towards him. I know I’m not supposed to get this attached to a boy… I’m trying to protect myself and Dylan comes along with his persistence and idiocy and throws all my measures and progress into the ocean.

I don’t even know what to do right now. Hearing Dylan’s story just tells me that I’m not the only one with a truckload of problems or a stained past. He’s just a guy that’s trying to cope with the fact that he lost his two mums… in under a year and he had to witness someone he loves die.

I’ve felt that way… the pain of someone dying… the pain of losing someone so dear to you…

Even if you never got to know that person. I’ve built a wall around myself… not letting people in that much, that was all until I met Dylan. Me pushing him away is just me protecting myself, it’s just me trying hard not to get attached, it’s just me fixing my mistakes and trying not to fall into that trap again.

But he makes it so difficult. He makes me regret slightly knowing him. Right now, I’m going to lock up those feelings in a cage and never let them out because as of now…

Feeling anyway towards any boy is an abomination.

And that’s the way it’s going to be.

Currently, I’m lying down on my bed, facing the ceiling and thinking about anything and everything. After Dylan poured out his life story to me, it proves that he trusts me. But then, I am not being fair because I’m keeping my own past from him and I’m not planning to tell him or anyone about it.

Not even my own best friends. If only they knew it… if I tell them, what would they think of me? Would they still consider me a best friend…?

Is it bad that I have trust issues all because of my shitty past?

All because of a bitch.

➰➰➰➰
It’s finally the day Dylan and I have to present the end product of our semester long project. We graduate during March next year… I’m going into college. I still find it hard to believe. I’m gonna miss high school… especially the Boo squad, even if they broke up.

Funny thing is, Nora stopped disturbing me since she gave me that speech and I’m grateful for that.

As our names are called by the teacher, Dylan and I step out while I say a silent prayer to God to help me not to make the same mistake twice. If I could survive high school and Dylan Sanders, I can probably survive college and any idiot.

Dylan begins to talk, telling the class all the things we went through during the project and when said stuff about proposing and how he loves me, it wasn’t in past tense like it’s supposed to be…

He kept talking in present tense like he really means it.

If that’s all he has been trying to do, then he’s getting an F in that assignment.

“In our wedding, we are expecting around 500 guests in total. Attendance is strictly on invitation, no invitations no entry,” I started and gave Dylan the opportunity to take over.

“We would have a red and white theme. We chose those colors because it fits Chelsea’s personality. She feisty, but at the same time, she’s calm and easy going. That’s why I’m pleased that she’s my wife.”

Shouldn’t that be in past tense? I cleared my throat and told him that I am not his wife and I’m in this only because of this damned project, but he just smirked and winked at me, making us to argue a whole lot more and Mrs. Duburg made us go back to our seats and gave us a B- because we were arguing.

At lunch, Dylan kept being annoying and I had to look at Katy and Nicholas kissing.

Yes, they are together now and they look super cute together. I have to admit, I am pretty jealous. They look so happy together. Dylan kept pissing me off and playing with my hair and I just let it slide for two reasons.

1. We would soon graduate from this hell hole and I have a 55% chance of seeing him there.

2. I want to enjoy these moments because I may not see them anymore as I'm going to a private college which is different from the on they are going.

My mum calls it Extra Protection against boys.

I tried convincing my mum to let me attend the city’s college along with my friends but she wants me to explore new environments. I really see no reasonable reason for that. It’s useless because I’ve already explored enough.

“Leave me alone Dylan. That’s just irritating,” I said slapping his face when he opens his mouth showing us his chewed food.

“Oww. What’s up with girls and slapping my face? Is it that irresistible?” he asked.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” I said rolling my eyes. And he got the message I didn’t want to talk to him anymore by shutting up. The bell rang and it was for P.E and it was for the whole set. All seniors assembled in the gym and me, being an awesome gymnast, changed into my leotard and went to our practice area.

It really sucks that we all have P.E immediately after lunch. They didn’t bother changing it because no one has shown that it affects them negatively.

They say it improves the digestion process.

My biology textbook says otherwise.

After our training sessions, everyone leaves to shower, obviously to get refreshed for the next period. Luckily, the whole set has this period as library time and they are free to leave as far as they return.

“I decided to go to the library with Abby while Katy and Nicholas went on a date. “I feel like he is stealing her away from me. Ever since they started dating, I don’t always see Katy like I did before,” Abby stated and I chuckled. I understand how she feels.

“Well, she is happy with him and the best we can do is to be happy for them and encourage her to go out more. She is your sister and you have every right to steal her away from him, just return her afterwards,” she laughed at this.

I’m glad I could cheer her up. She’s been really down since she wasn’t spending a lot of time with her twin sister any more.

In cases like these, I really envied them. They had someone to call a sibling. They could date without worrying about falling for the same trap again. They are so outgoing and don’t keep secrets from me.

And here I am.

Being a shitty best friend... probably the worst in the world.

Tell me what you think privately or comment, vote, share and follow.
Love you all
❤❤✌