When Bad Girls Fall In Love

Chapter 12 --- Virgin

I didn't answer my phone. Again. For the fifth time in just a day. I stared at it buzzing away on the arm of the couch, the glowing LED screen spitefully flashing a number with a local philippine area code at me. It finally fell silent and my jaw unclenched as I looked away, sighing at myself.

For two days after that breakfast disaster last saturday, It has been playing endless---over and over in my mind trying to sort out my conflicted feelings and two nights I been laying in bed trying not to think about the way his hands felt on my body, his mouth on mine.

I been sorely mistaken to think one night with him would get him out of my system and told myself I should just answer the phone the next time he called.

As if it read my mind, my phone started buzzing again, the same number on the screen. My hand drifted toward it briefly before my throat closed up at the idea of actually seeing him again.

I grabbed it, stuffed it under a couch cushion and walked quickly into the kitchen. My heart was pounding and breath was coming in rapid gasps.

"What the hell is wrong with me?" I asked my refrigerator. Yes, that's what I do when I'm being paranoid. I talked to the fridge like a mad woman. When it didn't answer I rolled my eyes at it and forced myself back into the living room.

I had been careful for so long, keeping my secret as close as possible so no one would judge me or think any differently about me.

I didn't want to have to think about it or talk about it or wonder if others were thinking about it or talking about it. But now since Kath's back in the picture the secret is in danger and most likely, it'll be out soon and I no longer had control over it because someone else knew.

Somehow, The thought of Patrick knowing my secret made me cringed. If He knew, Well, I knew enough and that should be reason enough not to want to see him ever again.

I closed my eyes and thought about how he'd stopped on the trail right before we made it back to the first curve of the whole jogging session with him that morning.

I had been hiking along, starting to get nervous about how I was supposed to act around him, but he'd taken my hand and pulled me close muttering something about one last kiss for the morning

And as soon as his arms were around me it was like all my concerns evaporated. All I thought about was how good it felt when he held me flished against his hard chiseled body.

So when he asked me for my number I had given it to him, not really thinking about it until it was too late.

And now he was calling, expecting to see me in a few days and for whatever reason I just couldn't do it.

Surely if I didn't answer he'd get the idea and just stop calling and I wouldn't have to deal with it. Or if he didn't cooperate I could change my number. Or move to an island in theCaribbean.

I shook my head at myself and wondered, not for the first time, if maybe I really was crazy.