THE RECORD SHOP ⋆ 𝗱𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗴𝗿𝗼𝗵𝗹

sixteen

MARCH 2, 1991. OLYMPIA, WASHINGTON.

THE SUN IS still yet to rise as Evie turns off her car where she's parked outside of the cemetery gates. With a bunch of lilies held tightly in her hand, she pulls her jacket around her tightly and weaves her way through the cobblestone path lined with gravestones adorned with a combination of fresh and wilting bunches of flowers. She takes the familiar turns in the darkness of the dawn to find the headstone with her mother's name.

Liliane Bouchard-Kelly
Beloved wife, mother and daughter
1946-1983

Evie cringes painfully at the short description of her mother, knowing she was so much more than just a wife, mother and daughter. She was the strongest person Evie ever knew. She was an artist and a friend, loved by so many, a Beatles fanatic who fought for her children to take on the names Maxwell, Lucy and Eleanor as their middle names in honour of the songs of Lennon and McCartney. She always smelt of lemongrass and lavender and would sing the French lullabies she was raised on to her three children each night before they would fall asleep, running her fingers through their hair until they drifted to dreamland. The last memory Evie has of her mother is this. Being put to sleep to the sound of Lily's silky foreign voice.

She lays the bunch of lilies down on her mother's grave stone and takes a seat on the patch of grass before it, letting her mind wander through the memories of her mother as the sun comes up, casting a warm glow over her.

"It's my birthday maman," Evie speaks out loud utilising the French term of mommy which she hadn't used since she was a child. She knows that her mom is listening, wherever she is.

"I'm 20 today. It's been a little while since we've talked because it's hard to visit sometimes, but I need you today mom."

The birds fly overhead, chirping brightly at the sun which makes Evie smile through her faltering as the tears begin to fall. She tries to think of something to talk about to cheer her up, willing away the tears.

"I've met someone, his name's Dave and I love him maman, and he loves me. He's a lot like dad, he's a drummer, a really good one. He gave me a first edition of The Catcher in the Rye for my birthday, your favourite. We met at work and he's in a band with some other people who've become good friends of mine. One of them reminds me of you, the way you used to talk and view the world. The way you wrote and painted. His name's Kurt. I wish you could have met them maman, you would have loved them."

Evie smiles as she imagines scenarios of the boys visiting the house and how Lily would have welcomed them warmly with open arms, showering them with fresh bread, pasta and coffee. She thinks about the way her mother used to sit on the deck, slouched in her chair with her legs stretched out, resting on the rail of the balcony with a book in one hand and a cigarette in the other. Her mother's smoking was a bad habit which Evie has unfortunately adopted.

"I'm doing better and looking after myself now. Dad makes sure of it. He misses you a lot mom, we all do. You'd be so proud of Oliver going off to school to be a writer and I wish you could see the young lady Mia's grown into. Je t'aime pour toujours maman. I'll make sure to make a special birthday wish today."

With the warm spring sun dancing on her skin, Evie stands and says goodbye. She's far more composed than she thought she would be, in the last few months Evie has really felt herself grow as a person and she has come to terms more with her past. She feels like this is the perfect way to enter her twenties, with new-found strength to help her grow.