Chapter 19

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Was Sophie supposed to be happy?

Part of her was happy, sure.  Mayber her friends would be more willing to forgive her when they spent some time doing near-death experiences and putting their life on the line every second. Hooray!

But most of her was dreading it so badly.  If her friends had dragged Amy into something against Sophie's will, and gotten her kidnapped, tortured, or maybe killed, Sophie didn't see how she would ever be forgiving.

And when she reversed the situation, Wylie's emotions seemed a lot more real and understandable than just being moody and angsty like a lot of other boys that she knew.

Biana, Stina, and Dex would be more forgiving, she was sure, but Wylie and her... they'd never really had a solid background.  Wylie internally blamed her for his father Prentice getting his mind broken and spending thirteen years in prison, half delirious while trying to keep the secret of her... well, a secret.

And getting Maruca taken was just another thing to add with a smiley face and a bullet point to her mental list of "Reasons Why Wylie Should Hate Me."

"Do you have a place in mind where we should go?" Sophie asked, because she was either unwilling or afraid to lead a group of powerfully rebellious half-friends with current status's of "I hate you so much."  

"Or a timeline? Or directions? Or even a plan?" Dex added, sending Sophie a reassuring glance.  Maybe she wasn't alone in the struggle after all.

Emery glanced a bit nervously at his fellow Councillers.  "Since Loamnore we've learned that maybe we aren't exactly the best at everything."

"Finally," Dex mumbled.

"We went in thinking that we would save the day like we always do but being a leader doesn't mean taking on the world by yourself.  It just means-"

"Standing up for what you think is right," Sophie finished, echoing what Amy had told her just that morning.  Emery shot her an approving glance, and nodded, looking a bit embarassed.

"But whatever the case," Bronte cut in, looking even more mortified that he'd even agreed to that.  "We would like you to figure this out by yourself.  You have the best interests at heart.   You know these people better than anyone else.  It pains me to say it, but you are more fit to do this job than any of our Emissaries or anyone on the council."

"It pains you," Sophie echoed.  Of all the assignments, why did they let her control this one, the one where she had no lead, no guide, no sense of direction?  Every other assignment, she'd pushed and pushed to let her lead independently and now they were finally letting her have what she wanted right at the time she decided she didn't?

"Welcome to my world," she muttered aloud.

"What?"  Stina asked.

"Nothing."

____________

"I'm coming with you," Tam, Linh, Keefe, and Fitz all said at the same exact time.

"Um, how about no?" Dex offered.

"We can't take everyone," Sophie explained.  "This is supposed to be a stealth mission.  Not a party.  Or a conga line.  If you all came we'd have almost ten people.  That's how many people I used to have at my birthday parties."

"What's a birthday party?" Biana asked, giving her a blank stare.

"Nothing," Sophie muttered.  "We have to take Team Valiant for sure- that was an order by the Council.  But..."

"What if we split up?" Fitz suggested.  "I take Tam, Linh, and Keefe one way, you take Team Valiant the other way.  We can report to each other telepathically."

"Splitting up doesn't sound like a good idea, but nine eyes- or technically eighteen, is better than ten."  Sophie bit her lip, feeling as if she was making a very bad decision.

"Then it's settled," Stina said.

I don't want to leave you, Keefe transmitted, and Sophie tried not to jump.

Her eyes watered as she realized everything she was giving up.  Every single sacrifice and every single choice and every single...

But that was being selfish.  And Sophie didn't want to be selfish, did she?

I don't want to leave you either, Sophie admitted.

And this time around, she looked everywhere but Keefe as she held up her crystal and slowly glittered away.

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