high school sweethearts | cranksepticeye

11 - subscribed

i was just doing my every day routine. i was checking my youtube channel after coming back from another terrible date to see if i'd gained anything. i'd gained a few subscribers and gotten quite a lot of likes on my new video. pretty regular. but what isn't regular was what i saw when i scrolled further up the page.

at the very top of the notifications, in my most recent activity, i saw a message that read:

jacksepticeye has subscribed to your channel

i sat and stared at the screen in awe. at first i thought it was one of those fake scam channels so i clicked on it. sure enough, it was really him. all of his videos were there, his verification was there. it was really him. he'd randomly subscribed to my channel after so many years of pretending that i didn't even exist.

did he realise what he had done? i started to feel that he may have done it on accident somehow. surely if he actually realised who i was he wouldn't subscribe, especially with our history.

did his girlfriend know about it? and if so, would she start messaging me and yelling at me? i dreaded the thought of having to speak to that possessive bitch again, especially for something that's out of my control. i can't control who her boyfriend subscribes to. it's not like i told him to do it. it was probably an accident anyway. perhaps he saw one of my videos in his recommended and accidentally subscribed when he scrolled past. yeah. that was probably it.

i shut my computer down and looked at the time; it was 11:24pm. i yawned and grabbed my phone, collapsing onto my bed. i couldn't be bothered to change. i didn't some nights. i heard my phone sound and panicked, thinking it may have been gab. i looked at the notification and realised it wasn't, before breathing a sigh of relief. it was the guy i had gone on a date with that night.

you never answered me when i asked about that second date by the way

i groaned and started to think. he was a nice guy. he was pretty attractive. he was funny, had a good personality and seemingly a kind heart.

he couldn't keep a conversation going as well as seán could.

i began to type a message hoping that this would be the last time i spoke to the guy.

no. sorry. have a nice night :)

i put my phone on my bedside table, ignoring the messages i was receiving. i knew they were all from him. he was probably flipping out on me and calling me rude like most of the guys i rejected did. but i didn't care anymore. i knew this whole dating game was becoming pointless. how would i find someone if i always compares every single person i met to him? i just wouldn't. it was so unrealistic.