Kibo ✶ Poe Dameron x Reader

Chapter 22 - Lights Up

Chapter 22

Feeling the ship land, I wake up bleary eyed. Rey places a hand on my non-wounded shoulder as Chewie picks up Finn.

"You coming?" she asks softly.

"In a minute," I choke back and she nods understandingly.

I stand and make my way to the cockpit as the other three exit the craft. I look down at the pilot's seat, patched up with silver tape from the many years of usage. I slowly take a seat in the chair and look out of the front. A tear falls down my face as I desperately try to hold myself together. Letting them rest at my side, my hand brushes against an unfamiliar fabric stuffed down the side of the seat. I pull it out and realise exactly what it is: my Father's old jacket.

I press it into my face, basking in his scent for a second before I clutch it to my chest and begin to sob. Not caring who or what can see or hear me, I let a scream rip out of my throat as I feel myself crumple into a ball of sadness and grief. I sob against the dark leather in a way that I don't think I ever have before. Everything feels numb. Meaningless. Like I have no path anymore.

Soft footsteps fill my ears but I don't look up, I already know who it is. "He's gone, Momma. I couldn't save him, I wanted to but he wouldn't let me. And-and he-,"

"I know you did, Baby," she pulls me close to her chest, her fingers running through my hair as I cry harshly, holding the jacket close to me. "You were so brave,"

"No, no I wasn't-" I sniffle disgustingly but she doesn't care.

"Yes, you were. You've made me proud, you've made the Resistance proud, you've made your Father proud," another sob escapes as I begin to claw for her embrace. "He was so proud of everything you've ever done. He looked at you as if you were the whole galaxy and he didn't die in vain, so don't let it be that way,"

I look up to her, seeing her stained red eyes filled with tears. She bends down and kisses my watery cheeks. "I sang to him. After he was-," I take a shaky breath. "I sang the blackbird song to him. I couldn't let him go painfully,"

"He didn't, I promise you," she nods, a trembling smile appearing on her face. "It'll be hard to accept but everyone around the Resistance is here for you,"

"How are you so strong?" I ask her as my breathing manages to calm down a bit.

"I'm not, trust me," she takes a deep but shaky breath. "It feels as though a piece of my heart has just been ripped out of my chest but like I said, I won't let him die in vain. He wouldn't want us to sit around and do nothing. He'd want us to celebrate the victory, raise a glass for him, and he'd want you to stop fretting over what's already happened,"

"It doesn't feel real," I sigh. "It doesn't feel like he's truly gone,"

"Because he isn't. No one is ever truly gone," she wipes my tear stained cheek as I wipe away one of her own tears. She chuckles as she sees the jacket in my hands. "He always said that he'd give that to you when you were big enough,"

"He did?" she nods and takes it in her own hands before holding it for me to wear. I slide my arms through the long sleeves and smile, bringing the cuffs up to my nose and inhaling. It smells of home and hope, with a hint of wookie and blaster dust.

"It suits you, my love," she kisses my forehead, letting it linger for a moment. She holds my cheek in her palm but her attention is quickly moved towards the patch of drying blood on my shoulder. "We need to get you to a medic,"

"It's nothing, Mom. I'm fine," I stand up but her stare stays the same. "Fine, i'll get it patched up,"

"Poe is going to have a heart attack," she laughs and I nod. "He really liked him, you know?"