Part 40~ No, I can't

480 23 24
                                    

As always, sorry if there are any misspelling and grammatical errors. I'm trying to do my best 😊
~~~
Hannah
I slowly opened my eyes and saw Alex's strong arm wrapped around my waist, holding me close against his chest. His hot breath hit my neck and I could feel him moving behind me.

For some reason, I feel guilty for doing this. It feels like I have been cheating on Shawn. I was drunk and so was Alex, it doesn't have to mean something right? And I can do whatever I want now. Shawn is no longer my boyfriend. But still, I have this weird feeling in my stomach that this was wrong, I shouldn't have done this from the beginning.

I carefully lifted his arm and went out of the bed and put on my clothes. As I opened the door I heard him turn around and my heart stopped. I looked over my shoulder to see if he was awake but his back was facing me and he let out heavy breaths, I let out a sigh of relief before I opened the door and sneaked out.

As I walked downstairs there were a lot of people laying on the floor and the couch. They were totally passed out. I walked around to see if I could find Anna or Liam but they were nowhere to be seen.

The morning was beautiful. The streets weren't empty, they never are. But still, it was peaceful to go along the Thames. The sun was low in the sky and the air was a little bit chilly but it was warm enough to not wear a jacket.

Some part of me wants Shawn back, but I know that I just going to be more heartbroken if I am going back to him. We were not meant to be. We didn't work together. I need to find someone else.

My phone vibrated in my purse so I took out my phone and looked at the display. It was Alex.

Alex
Already left? I thought
that we were going to eat
breakfast together

                                     Me
                                     Hi Alex! I'm so sorry   
                                     I had to do something,
                                     That's why I left.

Alex
Oh okay, I get it.
But are you free at
1 pm? Maybe we can have lunch together?

                                     Me
                                     I think that I am    
                                   free at that time. I  
                                     text you when I know

What should I do? He probably thinks that I like him just because we spent the night together. But I just like him as a friend. And I was just desperate last night.

I walked my way back to the university.

Shawn
I was back in London for some business. I can't stop thinking about Hannah. I screwed this up. I made a huge mistake. I should have told her earlier. I didn't want this to end like this.

And now when I was in London I couldn't stop thinking that I might be going to see her. Some part of me really wants to see her, while the other part says that it is a bad idea. But I need to see her. I really need to ask her. It may be going to change her mind. If I see her it's a sign that I should ask her. But if I don't see her, then I just need to move on and meet someone else.
-
-

I have just had a meeting for 3 hours. I walked out from the high skyscrapers and the sun hit my face. I could feel in the air that the autumn was near.

I walked along Oxford Street and talked to one of my friends on the phone. When I suddenly saw Hannah walking oppositely with her friend. "Eh, James. C-can I call you later? Something important came up"

I ended the call and looked at Hannah. She didn't look at me, her face was turned to her friend which I think is Anna. She poked her on Hannah's shoulder and pointed at me.

She turned her head to me and quickly looked down at the ground and turned around. Woah, she really doesn't want to see me.

"Hannah wait up" I jogged my way to her and grabbed her arm which caused her to turn around. "What Shawn? I have nothing to talk about. So if you excuse me, I am going to continue the day with Anna here and not letting anyone destroy it"

She hooked her arm with Anna but I grabbed her other hand to stop her from walking. "Please Hannah. Can't you just hear me out?" "No, why should I?" She turned her face towards me and tears started to build up in her eyes.

"I'm so so sorry for what I did. I should have told you earlier. And I am a horrible person. I have thought of you every day now. And I wish that I would have told you sooner"

"Yeah you should" she crossed her arms against her chest. "I'm going into this store, so you two can talk alone," Anna said to Hannah and let go of her arm and walked into the store we are standing outside.

"I'm so sorry Hannah. I still love you and I know that the feeling is mutual"

"No, not anymore" "Hannah, don't lie. I know that you still feel something for me. But you just telling yourself that you don't. I want to live with you. I don't want to live with another woman. You are the one I need in my life. So if you just give me one chance I can tell you everything. And when I say everything, I mean everything. Please, Hannah. I love you"

I opened my business purse and took out a little velvet box and Hannah's eyes widened. "Shawn. What att are you doing?" She swallowed hard "Shawn don't" she grabbed my elbows trying to pull me up from the ground.

A lot of people stopped in their tracks and looked at us.

"Hannah, will you give me one more chance? I promise to tell you everything. I can't live without you. I need you. And I want to spend the rest of my life with you"

I opened the box in my hand and showed her the ring.

"I don't know if I can" a little tear rolled down her cheek.

"Yes, you do. I know you do" I swallowed the lump in my throat.

"No, I- I can't" she shook her head slowly. "Yes you can"

"No, Shawn. Not after this" "Yes" I said firmly and stood up "Yes you can" I cupped her cheeks and she just shook her head and more tears built up in her eyes.

"Yes," I almost whispered and I could feel tears escaping my eyes. "I love you" I rested my forehead against hers.

"Please Hannah" I switched my eyes between hers "I'm sorry, I can't" She took a step away from me and my arms fell on the sides of my body.

Before she turned around I grabbed her hand and pulled her close to me and closed the gap between us.

~~~
I hope you liked this one 😊
And thanks for all the comments!!

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧- (𝐒.𝐌)Where stories live. Discover now