I don't think I'm the same person I once was. I'm not the bubbly happy child I once was. I'm not that innocent either. But, innocence is often lost with time. That wasn't bothering me though. It was the fact that I was a completely different person than when I was a young child.
Never did I think that suddenly I'll just be a shell of a person. Nor that happiness would be so rare. But, how did I reach this place? Now that I think about it there wasn't any major trauma which could lead to this.
I once broke down trying to understand how I could be such an empty shell of the person I was. I used to laugh over nothing. I had spring in my steps. I would trust easily, make friends with anyone. I was happy. My mother tried to comfort me that night. But she doesn't understand. No one would.
I'm scared. Scared of failing. Scared of disappointing. Scared of being happy. Scared of loving. I'm detached with myself. I'm so far gone that I can't even tell what I'm feeling. Why tears are falling when I'm watching a happy tv show?
How did I lose myself? Was it the constant need to please everyone around me? Or, was it choosing everyone over me? Was it people leaving me when they were done? It was maybe them saying something and doing everything but that. Saying that I was special but never proving it. Was it such a big hit to my esteem?
This doesn't matter now, does it? I'm cold now. I have walls so high that no one can get in. There is no door or a window for anyone to get in. I'll not get hurt anymore at least.
But, the question still remains. How do I find myself again? Will I ever be the same person I once was? Or do I refine myself into a new version of me, who is happier and has light in her eyes.
All hope is not lost, is it?
YOU ARE READING
The Truth Untold
Short StoryThese are short stories of no one in particular but that each one of us can relate. *edited-August 2nd,2021* *completed- May 27th,2021*
