The Truth Untold

Like a hurricane

   I feel lost. You are here, yet it's like we're strangers. Why is it suddenly so hard to talk to you, when we could go on mindlessly for hours? Why does it feel like we are miles away, even when you are standing right in front of me? Why do I not recognize you?
   What changed? How did we reach here? Why didn't you completely cut ties with me? You said thay you would always be straightforward with me. Then why do you linger in the shadows?
    You were never a part of the plan but you came in my life like a hurricane. I let it be. I was happy that I found you. A friend who could understand me better than everyone else in my life. I let my guard down, an act stranger than letting you in.
  We had endless conversations everyday. Talked about the universe and other mindless things. We shared our hopes and desires for the future. I told you about the past letdowns. And you convinced me that you wouldn't join that list. Then, why did you change your mind?
     "Did I do something unknowingly that hurt you?" This was my first thought. My only thought.
   Everytime I would see you, you would act like nothing happened just to leave me on read the next moment. You confused me. Did something happen or not?
   I would get frustrated and let you be. My pride hurt. Yet, the moment you reappeared, all sane thoughts fled. My pride forgotten.
   You chose others over me a million times, yet I always chose you. I didn't want to admit it, but I got deeply attached to you. A big mistake,yet again.
   Do you know that feeling where you feel inexplicably hurt and confused over someone's actions and you don't know why it's bothering you? That's what I am going through right now.
  This hurts more though. Since, you're always in the shadows. Reminding me constantly of your presence just when I had forgotten about you. Just when I was finally happy. Leaving me vulnerable and hurt.
   That's what I'm feeling. I guess that's what happens when a person enters your life without any sign and permission and leaves, again in the same fashion.
   What was it about you that I could neither hold on nor completely let go.