serendipity x shawn mendes

twenty nine

• andrea •

My birthday was coming to an end, and I was in my room, clutching my pillow with my eyes squeezed shut.

This birthday was the worst of all. Shawn never texted me. I went to the mall with my mother and she took me shopping, but that was all. I was thankful for her taking me though, because it got my mind off of him for a bit.

It was eleven at night now, and a tear slipped down my cheek as soon as my little sister walked into our room.

She sees me and gasps. "What's wrong?" her cute little voice asks sadly, and it makes me feel a little better.

"U-um, nothing, Anna." I whisper. "I'm fine, but could I maybe have the room to myself for a little bit?"

She nods, coming over and wrapping her tiny arms around me. "I won't tell Mommy that you're crying." she whispers and leaves the room.

After a while of laying there, my heart aching in my chest, my phone goes off. I barely have the energy to reach out and grab it, but I do.

And finally, I had a text from Shawn.

Shawn: Hey, happy birthday beautiful! How was ur day?

I'm shocked. What is wrong with him?

He told me just a few days ago that he would hangout with me on my birthday and make sure that my birthday was better than all of the past ones.

Does he think that now that I've agreed to give this a try, he can stop trying? That's probably exactly what he thinks.

I don't want to text back, so I can show him how it feels, but I have to. I can't help myself.

Andrea: my day fucking sucked.

Shawn: Why babe?

Andrea: i dont know who you're calling babe because i'm not your babe anymore.

Shawn: Woah. What did I do?

Shawn: Is this because I didn't text you back last night?

Shawn: I fell asleep.

Andrea: this is because i should not have given this a try in the first place. i dont want to do this anymore.

I start to type "I'm sorry" at the end, but I realize that I'm not actually sorry. I don't apologize if I'm not truly sorry.

Shawn: Andrea what is going on?

Andrea: i'm going to sleep. night

Shawn: No your not.

Him and his inability to use correct grammar. Why is he capable of making me feel this way?

• shawn •

Man, I'm such an idiot.

I spent the day of Andrea's birthday getting rid of all of anything that had to do with Bella. I wanted to be done with her for good, so I could focus on Andrea and only her.

I threw out pictures, letters, and everything in my room that had any memory of Bella with it. While I was doing that, I started to miss her. Trust me, I don't want her back, but I do miss her.

I sat on my bed and laid there for a while, thinking I was gonna text Andrea in a second. But my heart was aching too badly, and I wanted to sob but I wasn't going to. I couldn't anyway, there weren't even tears forming.

I ended up falling asleep before I could text Andrea, and I slept for about four hours. When I finally texted Andrea, she was not happy.

Now it's been too days, and I'm still desperately trying to get her back.

I guess I really never had her in the first place. I ruined all the chances I got, just like I ruin everything. I really do hate myself.

Shawn: Andrea...

Shawn: I am so sorry

Shawn: I ruin everything

Shawn: especially the most important things to me..

I tossed my phone on my bed, rubbing my temples as my pounding headache took over.

I had to go work at the pharmacy tonight, and I really didn't want to.

---

At the pharmacy, I had only been working for an hour and it was the slowest, most dreadfully long hour of my life.

The only time I really paid attention to a costumer is when Madison, Andrea's sister, came in.

As soon as she walked in, I jumped over the counter and rushed up to her, trailing behind her as she walked down one of the aisles. "Hey, can I talk to you?"

"Sure." she speaks bluntly, searching for something on the shelves.

"Has Andrea said anything about me lately?"

She rolls her eyes. "Nope."

"Is she... is she okay right now? Have you noticed her being sad lately?"

"How would I know?"

"Um, you live with her?"

"So? That doesn't mean I pay attention to her."

Wow. I don't even know what to say, just wow. I turn without replying and go up to the counter, grabbing a pen and a tiny piece of paper.

I write her a little note on it and wait for Madison to come up to the counter, and when she does I hold out the paper.

"Can you please be a good citizen for once and give this to Andrea?" I plead.

She snatches it out of my hand and reads it, then laughs. "This is pathetic. Just give up on her, she isn't worth it."

---

• andrea •

I was watching a movie in the living room when Madison came in with a plastic bag from the pharmacy Shawn owns. I wonder if she saw him.

"What are you staring at?" she snaps at me and I look back at the tv.

"Not at your ugly ass." I mutter under my breath. Of course, she's not even ugly. She's gorgeous, and I'm jealous because I can't even compare to her.

She leaves the room, tossing a slip of paper into the trash can before she walks upstairs.

xxx

I AM SO EXCITED FOR CHRISTMAS YOU DONT EVEN KNOooWwwowowowoWwoow