Why am I here?!

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Kara's pov

I stayed at the beach house and laid in my bed. I was so hurt to see her like that. Stop Kara! You don't feel anything, you feel nothing! But she said she loved me...Ugh Stop!

I was so frustrated with my thoughts I stood up and grabbed a bottle of scotch. Even though there is no effect, I was at least distracting myself.

The bottle was clearly done within minutes and I groaned. These fucking thoughts came back and I got so mad. I slammed my fists to a wall, clearly making a hole. Well I need to call someone to fix that.

I stood up and walked to the piano. I started to play sad notes. I mean of course you play sad, when you get cheated on! I started to play 'Winter Wind by Frédéric Chopin'. It was a piece that took hundreds of hours to master and I took only two hours. I felt relieved, that I was able to express my feeling through music.

Lately music has become my friend, since it was the only thing calming me down. The only thing understanding me. Minutes have passed and the piece has been ended. Right then, I felt miserable again...

My thought's went back to Lena...Always Lena. My mind was racing with one thing...Lena, Lena, Lena. Maybe I should give her a second chance? Ugh No!But when she said those three words she meant it...Kara stop!

I sat on the ground in defeat. I don't want to be here. The pain is too much, all I want is to be gone. I don't want to see people. I can feel myself giving up...Why am I here?!

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