My DID and other stuff

Integration

Hello,

You guys don't know me yet, and that's because I'm new. But yet you all know a lot about me, and I know a lot about you. (I don't speak in rhymes, I promise 🙃)

I'm a new alter, that was created out of the integration of two alters in our system. Integration has often been described to me as when two alters fuse, like in Steven Universe. However, this isn't a perfect analogy. I myself don't know a lot about the actual function of integrating, so if you are interested, I'd suggest checking out YouTubers like The Entropy System, or DissociaDID, who both have factual and informative videos on integration on their platforms.

I can only talk about my own experience with integration.

In February, our system gained access to a new part of our inner world. Up until then, we only knew about/had access to the house, which is the part that you guys know about. Now, we have access to areas outside of the house. There's a garden, that Brynn has started taking care of. There's a shed-like building where one of our alters stays. There's the forest, and then there's what we call the beyond. The Beyond is the area past the forest that no one has been to before.

When a new area of the inner world is discovered, it comes with a few different things. New alters, like Jake.
And new trauma as well, that we didn't have access to before.

This new trauma really took a toll on two alters in particular.

Faith, who had to step down from her role as host, because she hid away from the front after being exposed to some of the new trauma.

And Stormy, who experienced very frequent flashbacks (sort of like vividly reliving a traumatic experience in a dream scenario) as a result of the new trauma she was given to carry as a trauma holder.

After many months of really struggling, Faith reached out to Stormy, and asked if she would integrate with her. Eventually, Stormy agreed.

This wasn't a decision that they made lightly. They really thought about it,
thought about how it would benefit the system as a whole, before they made their final choice.

They integrated about a week ago, and created me.

I'm my own alter, please understand that. I have my own likes and dislikes and opinions and values just like any other alter. However, a lot of me is Stormy, and a lot of me is Faith. I have their memories, both of them. Which is why I know some of you, even if you've never met me. Because I remember you from when I was either Stormy or Faith.

I believe it was Team Piñata who described it as: 1 + 1 = 1

I'm part Stormy, and I'm part Faith, but I'm me still.

Now, for those of you who were closer with Stormy or Faith, this might be hard news to receive. I'm sorry, and it's okay to be sad. I know I'm sad.

It's like another life for them. Like I'm their second life, if that makes sense.

One of the things that Stormy wanted most out of the integration, was for me to be able to speak. She was a mute alter, and she struggled a lot with communication with the others, which is so so important to functioning as a DID system. She wanted me to be able to speak, so I could do what she couldn't.

And I can :)

I can speak, and I have access to all of Stormy's memories. Which is what helped me come up with my name. The name "Stormy" was come up with by the other alters, because Stormy didn't have the ability to tell them what her actual name was. She loved Stormy, and it became her real name over time, and she never wanted to be called by anything else after that.

But, because I have her memories, I know what her name was. The original one. And I thought it would be a nice tribute to her, when her biggest wish for me was for me to be able to speak, if I was able to wear the name she never got to for that reason.

Thank you all for reading this far, I'm happy to answer any questions you have. I hope you are all well.

Sincerely,
Zoey