Because Of The Journey.

41.

"My..my dad, he did this", Jessica said. "What is the reason for him beating you up like this? I mean look at you bro" I was just thinking of how sick that nigga Jason really is at this point. Beating your own daughter up like you probably fighting with Floyd Mayweather, like she's your own peer or your acquaintance for that matter, that's sickening and so disgusting.

"Here, drink some water", I gave her a glass of water before sitting next to her on the couch. "He's used to doing this. I guess he got mad because I decided to stand my ground" she said. "What do you mean?",

"He started when I was only 11 years old. My aunt, his sister was diagnosed with breast cancer. So each day he would come into my room to always convince me that he's checking for a lump on both my breasts. This went on for months and he showed no signs of stopping sooner or later. It felt really uncomfortable and one day whilst he was feeling on my breasts he was also jerking off."

"At that time I was dumb enough to believe every word he said. I asked him why he had his penis out, I was on the verge of crying because of how scared I was. He said he was also making sure that he doesn't have a lump on his penis because of course men don't have breasts."

By now she was balling her eyes out. "Where was your mother if I may ask?", "He would always drug her and she'd fall into this deep sleep where she wouldn't hear anything." I immediately thought about my own mother and how she also didn't hear nothing that day.

"When I turned 17, he wouldn't allow me to have any friends or boyfriends. He always said he was protecting me from this cruel world when honestly he himself was one of the most cruel men in this world. He was once in a gang.." ohh no, what? Jason? Okay who the fuck is this man? For real now.

"A gang? Like he used to trap?" I asked. "Yeah, he introduced me to his old acquaintance. The guy was 30 if not older and he became my first ever boyfriend. Well he even became my husband because my dad forced me to marry him."

I had no words yet I had so much to say. I just couldn't handle all that she had to go through.
"The day he told me I was getting married I was mad and happy at the same time. Mad because I was too young for marriage, I knew nothing about love not like the relationship was ever based on love even. Happy because I was getting away from my father not knowing that where I was going it was still going to be the same."

"All my life I had no say in the things I wanted, my father controlled me and Pete, my ex husband did the same thing too." "Y'all got divorced?", "Yeah. As I grew up I noticed that if I'd allow them to do whatever they want to do with me then they won't stop. My mother died of pill overdose because of Jason. That was my first ever heartbreak. So, because I didn't want to end up in a body bag just like my mom because of a man, I decided to speak up."

"They listened to you?", "Nah, I had to make them listen either way. I ran away from Pete and did all I can to find a job. It was hard because I didn't even go to school, all the jobs wanted some qualifications or experience. What did I have? Nothing! I felt useless but at least I ended up being a cleaner at some retail store."

"What was your dream job?" I asked. "I always wanted to be a nurse because my heart was with helping people. Then I wanted to be a social worker in order to help children going through the same things I went through but none of those dream jobs succeeded. I recently lost my job because the company was not making a lot of money so some staff had to go and of course I was the first on the list, sucks."

"You can still make your dreams come true you know. You can go back to school, become a nurse or social worker. It's not too late, trust me" I said looking at her. She smiled and wiped her eyes. "He apologised, that's why I moved in with him" I heard her say. "Who Jason?", "Yeah, I honestly believed him when he said he's a changed man. But I later regretted it because he became the monster I had left years ago." She looked at me and held my hand. "Your mother is a great woman and he doesn't deserve her. He does the same thing to her as she used to do with my mother. "

"He drugs her huh?", I asked already knowing the answer. "Yeah" she said nodding. "You can stay with me for a while. I'm really sorry for what happened to you nobody deserved to go through that. Sometimes men just feel like they are superior or whatsoever. When Jason left me laying there I.." oh no Shane you didn't. Yes you did. "I mean when he saw me on the couch he just started telling me about his past and how good it was. Her daughter and ex wife being the best thing to ever happen to him."

I had to close that up real fast, by lying too damn. "I wish to say he was telling the truth about all of that but he only made our lives a living hell. And thank you so much for your kindness", she said. "It's all good. Come let me show you your room."

She got up and followed me, after showing her the room I showed her where everything thing was and asked if she was going to be okay and she said yeah. I walked out the room and immediately went back. "Uhm hey, can I ask how did you know I live here?", I asked raising an eyebrow. "Orlando gave me your address a few weeks back." "Oh yeah, Lando". "He didn't want to but I convinced him please dont be mad at him" she pleaded. "Nah relax, it's all good." I said then walked out.

"Man I got tricked out my magic, shit getting drastic.
Lost out with the interns in terms of friction its static.
Painted the pictures traumatic sporadic actions of others got me fucked up with my brothers, I mean we actually brothers.
You know the label the label like they don't actually love us.
Niggas ain't come up in the hood that make them naturally suckers,
Blood suckers, muhfuckas, you know that I'm nice.
I had major setbacks and had to grow from them twice.
Do you believe in motherfucken miracles? And no I'm not religious bitch I'm spiritual.
They say damn we miss you shorty where you go? I say I just found myself like three years ago.
It's been a minute bro, I'm back up in it though. No limit endless infinite flows I invented those.
Fuck shit so minimal, critics so cynical.
Trigger my inner most emotional tinted soul."

I listened to Rockstar (Remix) by King Los. I had just popped a pill and I've been on them for a few months now. They helped get myself together because honestly I was falling apart in the inside. Listening to King Los's music is very therapeutic if I may say. He is surely one of the best Lyricists I know. One thing I love about his music is that he sometimes go deep, to levels of life not average but mostly the unseen.

"Baby!", I heard someone say. The voice sounded so far away and I wanted to laugh because of how squeaky it was. The more the person yelled out, the more i felt like i was floating around the room. I crossed my legs and placed my hands under my head and enjoyed the moment.

"Shanice!", Cole said making me pout. "Why you calling me Shanice? What happened to baby? You don't like baby now?", "Stop playing with me, pulling that Nicole stunt", she said laughing. "It's not a stunt, I'm just asking. And damn you look good ma", I said licking my lips. She had a tux on but she held the blazer in her hand.

"Thank you baby", she kissed me and I immediately kissed back. She then sucked on my neck making me moan in her ear. "Damn" she said in a low voice. "You like that?" I asked licking her ear. "Fuck yes" she moaned.

"Uhm Shane?" someone said and knocked on the door. Yow I forgot she was here. "Who's that?" Cole asked laying on the bed. "I forgot about her, her name's Jessica. Come in" I shouted the last part. She got in and said hey to Cole. Cole mean mugged the fuck out of her. I wanted to laugh but decided not to. "Uhm I wanted to know if I can start preparing dinner, I didn't want to touch anything without your permission" she said. She's sweet. Cole looked at me then back at Jessica.

"You don't really have to cook, we can order something to eat" I said. "Nah it's Okay, I want to", "Okay go ahead, thank you." She nodded and got out closing the door behind her. "She's my stepsister" I said to Cole. "Why she look bruised? She was mugged or something?", she asked. "My stepfather did that to her" by saying that I noticed my high was running out. I had to pop another one but Cole would kill me.

"What? The same nigga you used to stay with?", "Yeah" I nodded. "Did he touch her?", she asked looking mad. I looked at her, "Nah, nah did the motherfucker touch you?", she asked yet again with her forehead starting to sweat.

I just looked at her again with no emotion displayed on my face. "Okay then, I'll find out myself. And if someone dies, it's not my fault" she said standing up and went out the door.

- 18❤.