His Girl

chapter 59

"You kissed her" logan exclaimed. Right now me and Logan were going over gang stuff in my office and we had taken a detour as he asked how things were between me and Harper in which I then told him what a mess i made of everything. He wasnt much help though, he thought that I was rushing into things. I thought so too but thrn I remembered I kissed Harper all the time on the forehead when we were just friends. I sighed, this was a mess "let's get on with work" I tell him and he chuckles "your also gonna have to tell her about the gang stuff again" he says and I respond with a groan. Last time was bad enough.

Harper already thought I was some sort of assassin. I knew I had to tell her. She would find out eventually and that could cause her to hate me and whatever relationship we had would be destroyed. I decided I would tell her today, right now so I wouldnt back out. That way whatever relationship we did form would be based of the truth. "Harper can we talk" I ask walking into the library.  "Sure" she replies putting the book down. "So you probably know by now I'm into some dodgy stuff" I say sitting down next to her. Dodgy was an understatement. "Yeahhh" she replies, dragging the word out. "I want to tell you, so there isnt any lies between us" I say and she replies "thank you" I might as well get it over and done with. No sugar coating, blunt would be the best option. How blunt though. I kill people, no that's too blunt. I'm head of the mafia- maybe. I'm a gang leader- that seems ok. She already knows I'm some sort of criminal, I think she does anyway. I take a deep breath. It was time to tell her. "I'm in a gang" I simply say  and she doesnt look too suprised "explain " she says and so I do "I'm the head of a gang, actually the mafia. It's not as bad as it seems, we only harm those who are bad people, never anyone who is innocent. I will never hurt you so dont worry" I explain and she stands and backs away. I see fear. "You're a killer, how can you harm bad people when you are one yourself" she says backing away. I try to reach for her but she steps away, terror and panic in her eyes. I was the cause. Me. She was scared of me. "These people I kill, they are the worst of the worst, they harm innocents" I try explain but she shakes her head "no" she says repeatedly. "Harper" I try and she backs away further. I knew she wouldnt let me near her for a while so I backed away and left. At least now I had told her the truth.

That day was one of the worst I had with her. She eventually came around luckily, she had known evil in her life and apparently she didnt see me as evil...she didnt know what I was like at work though, I truly am evil. But the only thing that mattered was she accepted me as she didnt see a criminal only me. She chose not to see the inhumane side of me and focused on the good, although she didnt completely dismiss the fact but non the less I was happy.
Maybe if I tell her this time, i will get a similar reaction but then i might not.  She doesnt remember the good times we had together and she only has been told we are friends, she might think I'm lying. I couldnt tell her, not yet.
"She cant know, not yet" I tell logan and we start with our work.

Meanwhile

Harper

"And then he kissed my forehead" I tell ethan. I was currently explaining last nights events to Ethan. Ethan and Logan had come round to update james on work stuff and Ethan and stayed with me, we had a few bags and crisps and  chocolate and were just watching a film when he asked about james and I found myself telling him everything. All the while he had a massive grin on his face. I dont know why, I found it annoying. I was stressed and all he could do was smile.
"Sooo what do you think" I ask him after finishing telling him. His grin grew bigger, if that was even possible "you like him" he shouted like a girl. "Shut up" i tell him feeling embarrassed, James couldnt know.
"I mean hes really nice and I feel safe around him" I say however I knew that was just friendship too. I felt safe and I thought Ethan was nice but for some reason I felt more than that for james. "Just nice and safe " he asks and I shake my head and he laughs "dont tell him please " I say feeling insecure. He looks sceptical but nods "your secret is safe with me" he says just as Logan and james appear. "What secret" james asks. I look to Ethan and he winks at me "I promise" he says to me and I sigh with relief. Thank god. "Harper what secret" james presses, this isnt good. I need to think of something. "Yeah I dont think secrets are good" logan chimes in. Maybe I could get it back to them. "Just a minor secret, I'm sure you all have them" I say with a shrug. "I dont appreciate secrets in my house Harper" james warns, I found this stupid though because I knew he was hiding something from me. I could tell, his work in his office all day, how he wouldnt tell me what he did, well actually he did, when I asked he replied with "i own hotels, night clubs, restaurant that sort of stuff" and when I asked what Logan and Ethan did he told me "they work on my side business, it's just a hobby" and he got nervous and eouldnt tell me about his hobby/ side business.  I figured it was some embarrassing hobby that he didnt want to talk about so I dropped it. Yet he was getting annoyed with me for this and yet he wouldnt tell me his hobby.  "How about this, you tell me what your side business, hobby whatever you wanna call it is and I'll tell you" I say and he rolls his eyes. "No can do now tell me" he practically ordered. "Why do you want to know so bad" I ask. "Because I dont like the fact you're hiding something from me, I want us to be open with each other. I cant tell you what my side business is because that is work and it could change things between us, I dont want that to happen"  he says in a voice that made me feel guilty.
"Dude it's nothing bad, just leave it" ethan says and something about this makes him snap. "You're telking him yet you wont even fucking tell me. Him of all people. Seriously Harper.  What have I done to make you not trust me like this" he practically shouts, i could tell it was only because he was hurt that he shouted but non the less it hurt that he shouted at me and I felt a tear fall from my eyes. "Shut up james, cant you see you're upsetting her" Ethan says and pulls me into a hug. I hug him back, I needed this. This made james mood worse though "are you fucking in love with him" he demands and Ethan laughs, probably because of our previous conversation. "Well" he shouts. "No, I'm not" I practically whisper,  this side of james scared me. "Then fucking tell me" he shouts and I couldnt take it any more. I just burst out crying. "Stop dude, I'll tell you just shut up" ethan says and I feel betrayed.
"Shes on her period" he exclaims and I couldnt help but laugh at what he said. A great excuse though, I was emotional enough to be.

So honestly I love the character Ethan. He loves food and hes just  funny...especially in the next chapter and previous chapters.  Anyway I was thinking of giving him his own story. What do you guys think?
Also I know james seems sort of aggressive here, but hes just worried. Shes just come out of hospital so a secret to him means shes hurt and the shouting is him frantically worrying.