One Day At A Time

Chapter 13 - A Better Tomorrow

Khushi rummaged around the desk for her favourite black watch and found it inside an empty snack bowl hidden under the sheaf of papers. She slumped in her chair and stared at it bleary-eyed realising that it was almost dinner time. She was struggling to keep her eyes open, and the time on her watch made her feel more hungry. Now if only she could just lean forward, tilt her head and nod off for a few minutes!

The turbulent month of November had ended in utter exhaustion for Khushi. Hours of staying glued to the desk, day and night, preparing for the exams had worn her out completely. And now that she had them out of her way, she had been busy finishing a mountain of journal and lab work for submission before she left for her trek in two days. Fatigue had finally enveloped her in its strong arms.

Unable to justify a quick nap until her mum's call for dinner, she got back to her journal to sketch an organism, the species of which she could damn to extinction if she had the power to right now.

"When were you planning to tell me that you are leaving in two days, Khush?" Kabir barged into her room, his eyes blazing in indignation and hurt as he saw her sitting coolly at her desk wholly engrossed in sketching some intricate diagram on her journal. "Apparently the world knows about it except me! Were you planning to leave without telling me?"

The bark of his voice stilled her for a moment but didn't garner any reaction. She didn't look up or stop sketching. Kabir stood impatiently, towering over her chair, seething, willing her to look at him.

"Have things changed to this extent between us, Khush?" He asked, fighting to rein in the anger that was promising to annihilate his patience.

"You tell me, Kabs. I won't know." She said in a tired voice. "Things are not the way they used to be between us. So yes, I guess things have changed." She concentrated on erasing an odd curve she had drawn, unperturbed by his presence.

The situation had only deteriorated between them since their last chat at Kabir's house a few weeks ago. They hadn't managed a single conversation between them without getting into an argument. Every time they had bumped into each other, he had looked at her with those pleading eyes which would make her want to run away for her sanity. His eyes would be demanding or accusing at times, inducing spasms of guilt inside her for being the person who was responsible for breaking his heart into pieces.

They had managed to meet a few times at each other's house in the presence of their family for a quick coffee or tea but never alone. She avoided him as much as she could. And whenever they did find a few moments with each other, she tried to steer away from sensitive conversations which she didn't have the strength to indulge in anymore. She hated the situation they had gotten themselves into, but Kabir had left her with no choice. The growing distance between them had brought on an emotional chasm, and it was hurting both of them severely.

"We could have gone together, Khush. You know how much we both enjoy it!" Kabir said, his patience slipping out of his hands as he looked at her ignoring him completely.

"Perhaps that is the reason why I didn't tell you about it."

He stood still for a moment, reeling in the effect of her words that had smacked him in the face as they came out of her mouth unchecked and uncaring.

"For the love of God, can you look here and talk to me?" He raised his voice and snatched the pencil from her hand and turned her chair to make her face him.

"I have a submission due, Kabir. Can we please do this some other time?" She said flippantly as her weary eyes glanced at him for a moment before turning back to the desk to carry on what she had been doing.

He banged his hand on her desk in a fury. Her attitude and her indifference were pushing him over the edge. "You don't give a fuck anymore, do you? You don't care about me anymore!" He rasped as his voice quivered slightly.