No more excuses

Twenty-two

Taehyung

He was lying awake in his bed, staring at the ceiling. Rain was pouring down, and he kept listening it hammering the roof.

After the call with Namjoon, he had spend few hours to calm his brother up, until he finally had calmed down and fallen to sleep.

Jin had confessed to him, that he had made a deal with the other, to be his secret partner, while he still was engaged to Bogum. It was making him feel like shit, especially when Bogum was getting even closer to him.

It was killing Taehyung to see his hyung so broken about it, because usually it was Jin who was the backbone in their family, keeping everyone and everything in place.

He felt the urge to take his phone and send a message to Jungkook. If things would have been normal, he knew he would have never needed to be alone with this.

He pondered over the fact that knock was already 1am, and it was Sunday morning, and he had dumped Jungkook.

"Hyung?" Raspy voice is heard another side of the line, making Taehyung's insides warm with the familiarity.
"Kook, who's there?" Unknown male voice is burning Taehyung's insides with jealousy.
"Just go back to sleep, I take this outside"

Taehyung can hear rustling, assuming Jungkook was getting out of the bed. Door closes in his side, before his hushed voice speaks again.
"Hyung, are you okay?" Taehyung wanted to scream, or cry or something, but he knew he has no right to it, not anymore.

So he swallows the words he wanted to say, and answers to the younger with his quivering voice.
"I just wanted to speak to you, but you are busy. I'm sorry for bothering you"
"Tae.."

He doesn't listen, he only ends the call, putting his phone down. It flashes, when Jungkook tries to call back at him, but he doesn't answer, only looks at it.

Jungkook calls twice, and then sends him few messages, making the other turn his phone off.

He lays back down on his bed, hugging his stuffed bunny tighter, burying his face on its fluffy head, shredding few tears on it. He can't deal with this, he thought he wanted to be free, and see the world.

But his world was drained from color, his freedom didn't taste as sweet as he had tough, when he didn't have Jungkook in his life.

And it hurts him so much, but he only has to deal with it.

After all, it was his choice.

——————
Jungkook

He stared at the phone, raising it again in his ear.

"Number you are trying to reach is currently.."

He ends the call, feeling anxious. Taehyung had sounded so hurt in the phone, and now he didn't pick up. And it was making him scared.

"Kook?" Small voice from the bedroom door asks sleepily, making him turn around and smile lightly to the young man, standing there, dressed only in his oversized tee.
"I'm coming, don't worry."
"Who was it?" Boy asks, when he wraps his hand around his shoulders, leading him back inside the room.

"No one you should be worrying" Jungkook answers. Boy nods, snuggling in the warm sheets. Raven haired slides next to him, pulling younger closer, wrapping his hands tightly around his torso.

He can feel and hear when the other is fallen sleep, when he relaxes in his hold.

But he can't sleep, so he lies there, holding the other close to him, basking in the familiar warmth another body in his bed is providing.

But his head is in another place, thinking about another boy. Someone who he really wanted to be holding.

He sighs quietly, trying to not wake the other male.

Jungkook's bed doesn't feel so warm or comfortable as it used to feel, even tough he had someone next to him.

He only wanted the one, who was his whole world. But his world doesn't want him anymore.

And it hurts him so bad, but he only has to deal with it.

Because it wasn't his choice.