No more excuses

Thirty-eight

Third person view

Next few days were going painfully slow. Seokjin wasn't ready to deal with the situation, so he was only laying on a bed, at their apartment, surrounded by all the familiar things, reminding him about the time when they were happy.

Jimin was in charge to take care of the broken male, making sure he eats and bathes and doesn't do anything rash on to himself.

Namjoon, as everyone else, was grieving too, but he could hold himself together better than Seokjin. He knew that the others needed him to be the strong one, guiding them through this tragedy.

Hoseok and Yoongi were helping him, to get everything done what needed to be done, and they all dreaded the day when everything would be final.

—————

It was September first, a beautiful cold morning when they were gathered at the living room on the Seokjin's apartment.

Namjoon had told them that he meets them there, so Hoseok, Yoongi and Jimin were in charge of getting Jin ready and bringing him there.

"I don't.." Seokjin starts, swaying in his steps a little. His suit was big on him now, he had lost so much weight in thous days, and all the color was washed away from his face.

Jimin sighs, taking Jin's cold hands on his. "Let's go" he says quietly and the older manages only a small nod.

He follows them at the car, and only sits in the backseat, looking straight out of the window, but he can't see the changing scenery.

"We are here" Jimin says, he's been sitting next to Seokjin, and first time in weeks older really looks at the younger. He can see how Jimin's eyes are puffy and red rimmed, indicating that he's been crying, how he's pale and looks broken.

Seokjin sighs, taking Jimin's hand in his and looking him straight in the eyes. This grief wasn't only Seokjin's, this was theirs.

"Let's do this."

——————

The casket was open.

Jin can't help himself, he moves like he's but under a curse, hesitating towards the wooden casket and the body lying in it.

There is a man on the floor, crying, holding the sides of the casket, and Namjoon is standing few steps away from them, looking pained as well.

Familiar mop of dark hair is all Seokjin can see from the man screaming his agony and misery out of him, crouched next to the casket.

His eyes shifted, and they land on the cold, pale body of his brother.

He almost looks like he's sleeping. Like he could just jump up and tell them that this was only one of his stupid games.

But this is not a game, or not even a dream, even tough how badly Seokjin wanted it to be.

Taehyung's bright shining red hair is lost all the shine, and his warm tanned skin is faded, lost all the vibrant colors and warmth.

Seokjin falls on his knees, holding his cold, pale hand on his, and feeling how his heart bursts on the thousands of pieces.

Loud cry escapes from his mouth, and he leans to kiss his brothers hold hands.

"I'm sorry.." he hiccups, guilt eating him out from the inside.

He can remember the last time he and Taehyung talked, and he was so angry at the younger, accusing him to ruining his life, when he only had wanted to help his only brother.

And now it was too late to apologize.

"I love you, and I'm so sorry" Jin cries, still holding on the younger.

He can feel how someone wraps his arms around him, pulling him in the hug.

It's Jungkook.

They hold on to each other's, both broken.
Jungkook had lost his soulmate, his other half, and Jin had lost his whole family.

So they hold onto each other's, crying in front of the open casket.