Building Attachment

Chapter 22

POV: Anakin Skywalker

"Close your eyes," I told her. It was no question. It was a command. A command I needed her to follow, despite the suppressed protest from the rational part of my brain that knew her disobedience would be the only way to save us from crossing this line.

A look of confusion drifted across her delicate facial features as she processed the changing intensity of the atmosphere that surrounded us both. Every youngling who trained to become a Jedi was conditioned through an unwavering repetition of teachings to believe that the kinds of feelings that I could no longer deny feeling towards her were forbidden. I knew this as well as any Jedi could, but as a soft questioning smile drifted across Ahsoka's face, giving way to the confusion she was no doubtably feeling, I couldn't find the resistance I needed to stop this mistake from becoming an unchangeable event, permanently carved into the timeline of our lives. 

Seconds bled into minutes and her smile ever so slightly faded as she realized the intensity of the atmosphere that surrounded us. After one last lingering look in my direction, she gave into my command and closed her eyes.

A few moments passed in silence as I studied her face, starting with her unique white facial marking, down to her patiently closed eyes and the curve of her nose, memorizing every detail as I went. By the time my eyes find their way to her beautifully tinted gray lips, her breathing had deepened and her long fingers began to fidget.

"Master?"  I was too far gone to acknowledge her question by the time my head started dropping down to her face, closer and closer until there was barely an inch between. "Master..."  

My gaze quickly darted up to her anxiously closed eyes as I recognized the warning in her tone. Listening to warning never had been among my greatest strengths, a fact I was sure she would be cursed to remember after I followed through with what I already knew there was no stopping me from doing. So after letting my eyes shamelessly drift across the angles of her face one last time, I quickly closed the rest of the distance between us and pressed my lips to her increasingly tempting gray ones in a harsh and heedless kiss.

A flinch ran down her body and a gasp escaped her throat at the unexpected and profusely inappropriate contact, but she seemed too shocked to be able to push me away. Instead of pulling away like I should have, I look advantage of her shock and let my hands find their way to her lekku and all the way down to her waist as I gently pulled her tighter against me. A soft whimper fell from her lips as i ran my tongue along the seam of her lips, and a moment later I was surprised to feel her fingers weaving through my hair and tugging my head down so that she could dig her teeth into my bottom lip.

The feeling that pulsed through my entire body as she kissed me was so electrifying, it effortlessly overpowered every other competing thought that passed through me mind, leaving behind nothing but a growing hunger inside of me that I knew only she would ever be able to satisfy for the rest of my life. Despite this realization, I knew this could never happen again and did my best to savor every moment she was willing to give me, until she pulled away from me to catch her breath.

Reality came crashing back to me as I felt her fingers drop from my hair and watched her back away from me with a disbelieving look in her widened eyes. "Anakin," she whispered, the syllables sounding so rich and gentle as they passed through her mouth. She looked down and blinked a few times as she gently touched her lips, before looked back up at me with a blank stare.

Charged silence passed between us as I looked into her eyes waited for her to try to stop me as I took her closest hand, pulled it up to both of mine and clasped both my flesh and metal digits through her unresisting fingers in an attempt to hold on to her just I little bit longer before I knew I had to let go forever.