I'll die so you can live.

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Mariska took a big breath as she entered the restaurant, she took a look around then realized she was the first one there. She sighed a breath of relief then made her way onto their reserved table. 

She'd been dragging that day ever since they'd talked about it. It wasn't that she didn't want to see them, it was that she was worried about the ice breaking. Surely everything was going to be really awkward before they went back to normal. 

She stood up when she spotted Preshani walking into the restaurant then waved her hand so the girl could see where she was. Preshani smiled through her mask when she saw her then made her way to where she was seated.

"Hun, you look so lovely. I like that brown on you", Mariska complemented her old friend. "You think so? I'm still deciding how I feel about it", Preshani responded as they both had a seat. "So how is it going? How's everything?", Preshani asked after she was settled. That was a question she'd always hated asking but it was better than silence she'd thought. The question was so simple and all Mariska had to say was 'I'm fine' but she couldn't help but wonder if she knew. 

Was she asking that question to test her? She hated what she was doing to the girl and she couldn't stand the quilt. She knew Preshani dated Bruno over a decade ago but he was also her first love and well, she probably wouldn't be happy if she knew what was going on. That's if she didn't know already.

"I mean I'll feel better once I don't have to wear this anymore", she'd decided to say pointing at her designer mask. Preshani chuckled at that just as Ashley approached the pair. The two girls greeted the girl and soon engaged in conversation. "Is Dineo still coming?" Ashley had asked after they'd been talking for a while. "Last time I checked", Preshani responded looking at her watch. "Maybe something came up", Mariska said as she waved the waiter over to make their orders.

"Mh, that's weird though. She would've said something," Preshani now said. She knew Dineo well and that was so unlike her. The three girls then continued with their day choosing not to dwell too much on Dineo, she was a grown woman. 

They'd caught up on life but there was a barrier present. They all had certain things they couldn't talk to each other about and it felt different because they'd been used to sharing everything with each other. 

"So how's the little baby and Siya Ash?" Preshani had asked as they continued conversing. Ashley wanted really bad to tell them what was really happening. She'd been silently dying inside and couldn't talk to anyone about it. She was nearing depression and was genuinely worried about her well being and the effect it was ultimately going  to have on her child. Her mom telling her to suck it up was not helping her either. She was not ok. "Oh they're great thanks, Meg is starting to crawl," it was like lying had become their new normal. Mariska and Preshani could see the bullshit right through her eyes. Their friend was practically crying for help, she needed to be rescued. But was it their place? Did they have that right still?  

"Oh that's lovely", Mariska said choosing to end that discussion. It was clearly making Ashley uncomfortable.

And then there was silence.

Thankfully their food arrived a short moment later and they'd never been so happy to see food. 

Bruno then chose that moment to call Mariska, her phone was beside her on the table and of course Preshani saw. Bruno wasn't necessarily a hard name to spot. Mariska let her phone ring for a while before answering. She froze because she knew answering was probably not a good idea, but also not answering meant she was hiding something. 

Bruno and Mariska had been talking. Just talking, but there was clearly something there. She'd never connected with someone on an emotional and spiritual level before. All the connections she'd had before had a sexual attraction laced in. It was usually sex then get to know them. They rarely lasted.

But it was different with Bruno, they weren't trying to have a connection, it was just there. Yes she was attracted to the boy, it had been clear that she had a type but a part of her was not in it. Mostly because of his history with her old friend. 

So Mariska joined her friends back after she'd stood up to take the call. She noticed a facial expression on Preshani she couldn't decipher. "Uhm", she started as she thought of the right way to go about explaining. "Don't worry about it", Preshani surprised her. "You don't have to explain", Preshani continued after she saw Mariska's unconvinced face. 

"If this bothers you one bit, I will stop", Mariska said meaning it. She'd never connected to someone quite like she did with Bruno but nothing was more important than her friendship with the girl.

Preshani didn't know how to feel. She didn't own Bruno and she certainly didn't still have feelings for him, not one bit. Her heart only belonged to one man. But she couldn't help but feel a strange strain in her heart. Maybe it was because she felt they went behind her back. She wasn't that much into girl code but she could've just spoken to her about it.

Disappointment, that's what it was. If it was someone else she wouldn't have cared. But don't friends have to care about each other's wellbeing? Clearly Mariska didn't care about her enough to just make sure she was ok with it. Guess they weren't really friends anymore were they?

"Oh shoot, I just remembered I have to meet up with Mike. He's got a thing this evening and you know how big of a baby he is." Preshani stated a short silence later. She suddenly felt uncomfortable being in the same space as the other girl. If the phone thing didn't happen, would she have ever told her? How could she trust someone like that?

"Oh, do you want us to walk you out?" Ashley offered but Preshani sweetly declined. She just wanted to not be there.

As Mariska sat watching her old friend pack up to leave. She felt a tightness in her chest. The incident that happened a few years before with Tyrone had permanently labelled her a homewrecker. She was seen as the girl who gives no regard to other people but herself. This time she wasn't going to do that. 

She was going to put her heart to the side just so her friend could be happy. 

The Chronicles of Life. (Complete)Onde histórias criam vida. Descubra agora