Chapter 59~

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~Y'all better prepare yourself~

Cristina's POV:

"Two tickets for Cristina please."

"Sure give me one second."

I was getting Shawn and I tickets for junior prom. I figured since he's always offering to pay for stuff the least I could do was pay for these.

"Here you go." Said the girl in the booth as she handed me the tickets. "That'll be $70."

I handed her the money and I left.

"Hey Cristina." I heard Shawn say.

"Hey babe." I gave him a quick kiss on the lips and I pulled out the tickets from behind my back. "Look what I got us?"

He looked at the tickets and smiled. And I don't know what about the smile was different than normal. It's almost like it was fake.

"Oh! Are these for prom?"

"Yup! Who's the best girlfriend ever?" I said as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

"You." He said flatly. "But I haven't even asked you yet. I was planning on this whole romantic thing."

"Well I still want the romantic gesture, but I figured that you always spend your money on me so it was about time I start returning the favor."

"I know, but I just wanted—"

I put my finger on his lips and shushed him. "These tickets are non-refundable so you might as well just let me win this one."

He sighed. "Okay."

~Skip to after school at his trailer~

Shawn was acting super weird all day. When I kissed him it started to feel forced, when I hugged him it took him a minute to hug me back. And he smiled less than he normally does.

We were watching tv on the couch and I scooter super close to him. At this point, he normally puts his arm around me and I put my head on his shoulder. But he wasn't doing that...

I decided that whatever was bothering him I was gonna help distract him from it. I began to kiss his neck, but he wasn't reacting.

"Cristina i'm not in the mood."

I pulled away, shocked by what he said.

"Okay what's going on?"

"What do you mean?"

"'Not in the mood?' You once asked me if I was down to do it in the bathroom at the gas station."

"Well that was then. This is now."

I grabbed the remote and turned off the tv.

"Hey!"

"Are you mad at me or something?"

"No."

"Shawn, you've been acting weird ever since I showed you those stupid tickets."

"If their so stupid then why did you pay for them?"

I stood up from the couch. "Is that what this is about? The fact that I paid for the tickets?"

"You know what?" He stood up from the couch to meet my gaze. "Yes. I don't like that you paid for the both of us without asking me."

"I don't see what the big deal was. You pay for me all the time. Why is it any different when I buy you something?"

"Because when I buy you something it normally doesn't cost over $20. But I saw the prices for the tickets and I was planning on saving and then asking you."

"Shawn all those little things add up. Plus, i'm a big girl. If I want to start paying for stuff then I can. And you shouldn't get mad about it because it's my money and I decide how I want to spend it."

"You wouldn't understand because you've never felt what it's like to not have money. Is it my fault that when I do, you're the only person I want to spend it on?"

"God Shawn, why do you ALWAYS have to make everything about money and how much our parents make? Yeah my parents never had to worry about money, but i'm not a free loader Shawn. I earned this money at my job! And you know what? Why do you always have to judge people by how much more money they have than you? Everyone has struggles. You've never had to deal with a mother who constantly berated you about what you wore and how you acted to the point where you questioned if she loved you. But do I rub that in your face? No I don't. Because I know that just because you haven't been through what i've been through doesn't mean that your life is peaches and roses."

"That's just it. You've gone through all of that and at the end of the day you're still okay. By the end of the day i'm still the poor little trailer boy."

"Who told you that i'm still okay? Who?! Because whoever it was, lied to you. Shawn I wake up everyday and go to sleep at night in SPITE of everything that's going on in my life. I put on a brave face and try my best to be happy everyday because I know I still have people who care about me. But I guess you never considered that deep down at the end of the day I still feel like the broken little girl from the broken little family. Or that I remind myself that even if Derek was a dick, maybe on some level him cheating on me was my fault. Or that maybe everything bad that has happened to me was my fault and that's why it took so long for somebody as compassionate as you to love me and not leave me." Tears were streaming down my face at this point. "But I guess we're all just little people with little problems in Shawn's world huh?"

Without waiting for a response I speed out the door and bolt to my car. I heard him calling my name from behind me, trying to catch up. But I was too fast.

I got in my car and drove off. As soon as I left the trailer park I began sobbing my eyes out.

I've heard couples say that everyone has a first fight, but ours seemed bad. I began to over analyze everything I said in the fight and I regretted saying every word.

I started crying harder as I came to a stop light. I started banging my hands on the wheel.

"Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid...." I just kept repeating these words to myself over and over again. I was internally debating if I should turn around and go apologize.

Would he forgive me?

Does he not love me anymore?

How bad did I hurt his feelings?

What if he hates me now?

What if he never wants to speak to me again?

The light turned green and I kept my eyes locked on the road in front of me. I began repeating my mantra again out loud while banging on the wheel.

"Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid..."

I noticed a bright light come close to my car.

By the time I turned my head everything went dark.

I crashed.

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