Crippled Hearts ~ Namjin

Fatigued

Namjoon's POV

Fatigue that's all I have known for the past six months, I cannot remember when was the last time I slept peacefully, maybe when taehyung was home and seeing his boxy smile and cute antics I felt at peace, knowing that my baby brother was happy and safe was peace for me but now that he isn't here it feels as if sleep and peace has long left my side.

Its been six months since taehyung has disappeared, I have lost count of numerous police stations that I have visited desperately pleading them to continue the search for my brother ,to not give up in finding him many called me crazy , I remember the words of an officer before he shut Taehyung's case file You are looking for a needle in a haystack young man, do you know how big Seoul is we have no idea what must have happened to your brother. There are human traffickers, murderers, rapist and serial killers out there anything could have happened to him its been six months, I think you should just accept it and start living your life again your brother is gone he spoke.

Did you find his body?

What?

I said did you find my brother's dead body?

No, we didn't

Then how are you so sure that he is dead, when you didn't even find his dead body, how can you fucking sit here without doing anything and say that my brother is dead! who the fuck gave you the authority to do that! My brother is not dead you better not speak bullshit and close his case files on the pretext of that nonsense, I am going to find him, I am going to get him back, I spoke enraged.

And its been two weeks since that outburst I am still looking for Taehyung with the help of Officer Jeon Jungkook , he was the first investigating officer on this case and he had found immense leads on it but somehow the case got transferred to another one and that's when I realized there is a bigger picture to it, one that refuses to be uncovered and when all doors were shut I found my way back to officer Jeon.

Lost in thoughts I hadn't realized when a young man jumped right in front of my car and i hastily  pressed the breaks , my heart beating out of my chest at the close encounter angrily I stepped out of the car only to be met with the most angelic face, his grey eyes filled with worry and fear, his pink plump quivering lips and his soft rosy cheeks that were now pale with fear.

I-I am really sorry, I was trying to get a hold of my dog, he just ran across the street all of a sudden and I panicked, I-I should have been careful, I am extremely sorry, he was shaking with fear while vigorously rubbing his palm together in apology.

My heart melted at the sight, His child-like innocence was like a strong scent that was mesmerizing me and ushering a quiet and calm feeling to my heart , I looked down at the cute white Maltese dog his black eyes shinning with the same innocence as his owner , he was looking at me with those pleading eyes as if apologizing for his fault, I sat on my haunches and gently patted his head as the dog sniffed me and got comfortable with my touch, once done I got up to look at the handsome owner who was still shyly shifting on his feet.

It's alright, it isn't your fault, I wasn't paying attention on the road either, I am sorry too, did I hurt you? are you alright? I asked attentively.

Y-yes, I am fine, don't worry, he gave me a shy smile.

Would you mind if I ask what must you be doing here on this deserted street at such an odd hour?

He looked a bit uncomfortable chewing on his bottom lip , I could see he was having a hard time trying to form an answer to my question, I could sense his restlessness and had no intention of escalating it further, It's alright If you don't want to answer, I completely understand its not my place to ask you such a question, it's just I was a bit worried since it isn't safe to roam the streets at such an odd hour especially the one we are on currently, I tried to ease the situation as I spoke.

N-no its fine, I do understand your concern actually I was looking for a shelter for Jjangu, he nervously spoke.

A shelter for your dog? Are you abandoning him? I was startled at his revelation; wasn't this the same dog he had just tried to save from a speeding vehicle if he really wanted to abandon it why would he save it in the first place?

I don't want to but I have no choice, his voice began to get shaky as he spoke further, I-I can't keep him with me anymore, his voice was a soft whisper by now, My uncle has found me a wonderful job and the company has also allotted me an accommodation but I cannot take Jjangu there with me since dogs aren't allowed on the premises. My uncle refuses to keep Jjangu with him and I don't have any friends in this city , I am new here , I thought of leaving Jjangu at a dog shelter but uncle said we have to leave tonight , I thought I will look for those makeshift dog shelters that are present on streets or side-walks and leave Jjangu there maybe some kind person would see him there and take him home.

My heart churned at his confession he was being forced to abandon his dog and what kind of workplace was this that had such rules for their accommodations, I didn't know of any place that kept such irrelevant rules, I could see the internal turmoil on this young man's face and looking at the cute little Jjangu I felt fate was being extremely cruel to these kind souls and I couldn't help the words that left my mouth.

I could keep him for you, I love dogs I had one too but I lost him a few years ago , I would love to keep Jjangu for you and on your free days you can come and meet him if you want, in case you decide to shift to another place or rent your own you can always come back to take Jjangu away.

Will you? Are you serious, you will take care of my Jjangu? He asked startled.

Yes, I will, I promise I will take good care of him, I gave him my dimpled smile.

T-thank you , T-thank you so much, you have no idea how much this means to me, I was so scared for Jjangu but now that I found you I feel a huge burden has been lifted off my chest, Please take care of him for me, I will try my best to visit him, what's your name? where do you live? He bombarded me with queries.

Kim Namjoon, I live in Gangnam-gu, there's a really famous restaurant there Jungsik right next to it is an apartment building called Apgujeong I live there on the fifth floor in apartment number 502, you can come there and here's my number, I took my business card out and handed it over to him.

You work with a music company, You're a music producer? he looked stupefied as he stared at me and then back at the card.

Umh yes, I am, I nervously answered while scratching the back of my head.

That's awesome he smiled as he picked Jjangu up and hugged him tightly , he cried silently while hugging the dog and gently rocking him to sleep , he looked at me with those tear-filled eyes and spoke Please take care of him , he is all I have , he is my only family, I gulped at his desperate plea and gently nodded my head.

I will come back for you Jjangu baby, be a good boy and stay with Namjoon hyung okay, he is a nice man, I love you so much and as he spoke, he peppered little Jjangu's face with kisses. Their moment got interrupted as a car came to halt on the opposite side of the street, the windows got rolled down and I saw an old man pop his face out of the window and call for the handsome man in front of me Jin come on we are getting late, he yelled.

Samchon I am coming, the handsome young man supposedly called Jin yelled back at him.

He handed Jjangu over to me hurriedly as he spoke Please take care of him Mr Kim, I will come to meet him, apartment- 502, fifth floor, Apgujeong right next to Jungsik restaurant, Gangnam-gu, right? He asked fervently.

Right I smiled back at him

Okay bye then and I am sorry I forgot but my name is Kim Seokjin, bye, he spoke as he dashed across the street and got into his uncles' car.

"Kim Seokjin,"  

"Seokjin"

Just like the meaning of his name which was to be a great treasure, he really was a treasure, kind, unique and beautiful in his own way specially those grey eyes that enraptured the heart with their first look.