October 22, 2020.
I said lots of things yesterday. Hurtful things. I lost control of my emotions. I became angry and bitter. The amazing thing was that I was conscious of the anger growing in me, and I inwardly said to myself,
"You know what? Fuck it. You win this time. I'm going to let loose like werey (a mad person)."
I consciously gave up my emotional freedom to another person. It was this religious WhatsApp group I'm in. I talked with my lil bro and somehow I let my head-nut loose. We just had the Lekki mass-slaughter in Lagos, Nigeria, and the country was in chaos, yet, they were putting out ads for a church programme when the streets were not even safe for people to walk in. This got us angered.
At the moment of outburst, it was kinda refreshing to release all those stored anger. It was temporal though. I remember feeling drained right after the outburst. And somehow, I feel a little remorseful now.
These emotions are stressful. Anger and bitterness especially. They zapped me yesterday. I was physically drained and weak.
I'm more conscious of myself at the moment and will be going in for a period of deep personal spiritual alliance.
I feel like I'm not centred.
I'll be taking a break from the world and just go be with myself. The storm has nothing on a ship that's well anchored.
YOU ARE READING
Bedroom Whispers
Non-FictionThe bedroom holds sacred territory for me. The bed, its altar. One upon which I've offered sacrifices, so many to count and recall. One upon which I currently lay as I once more pay my dues, in taps and clicks. I miss the days when the gods were co...
