Me Without You

Promises

Things between them continued to get weird. Instead of using his free time with Mingyu, Jeonghan would occupy his moments with Hoshi. During Caratland, Seungkwan described them as a pair of newlyweds and Mingyu's blood boiled. It was like Jeonghan had moved on without a care.

Hoshi vied for Jeonghan's attention .Hoshi had always asked Jeonghan to be closer and this year they seemed to be partners in crime. So much that Jeonghan had confided in him so many things, including his true feelings for Mingyu.

It was never easy for Jeonghan to reveal his own emotions; Usually he was the one doing the listening. And although he had so many people he could count on, he felt like this time they wouldn't understand. Hoshi was different though, because Jeonghan knew that he himself had feelings for a another Seventeen member.

Hoshi never struggled with his love for Woozi. He was always so open, but Woozi wasn't ready to accept his love just yet. He didn't reject Soonyoung, yet he had decided to put Seventeen first. His only love for now, could only be his music. And Hoshi was okay with waiting, it's like he knew someday they were meant to be, there was no hurry.

Jeonghan's birthday was right around the corner and days before the fight Mingyu and Dk had already bought gifts. While Dk had gotten him the screen, Mingyu had gotten the projector beam. Mingyu's plan was to make a video with moments he and Jeonghan had shared and show it to him on his special day. Instead Mingyu made one of Wonwoo and himself during the tour. Once Jeonghan saw the video, he felt a little betrayed, even though he was never jealous of Wonwoo.

Hoshi lays in bed when he hears a light tapping at his door. Jeonghan stood silently in the dark hallway waiting to be invited in. Hoshi makes room inside of his blanket and Jeonghan climbs into bed. He places his head on Hoshi's shoulder but remains quiet until Hoshi ask, "You want to talk about it ?"

Warm tears gush down Jeonghan's cheek and onto Hoshi's shoulders, but still not a single word. Hoshi positions himself in front of Jeonghan and wipes away the tears. His tiny eyes squint and shrink a size as he smiles brightly, trying to cheer up his friend. "I don't like to see your pretty little face full of tears," Hoshi whispers as he kisses Jeonghan's forehead.

Hoshi loved Jeonghan in a completely different way. He admired him like no one else and to see a torn Jeonghan was heart breaking.

"I need him," the words finally escape Jeonghan's mouth, "but I don't deserve him," he cries out. Hoshi doesn't know what to say so he waits for him to continue. "Promise me you'll make sure I stay away," he pleas.

Hoshi only nods in agreeance and wraps his arms around Jeonghan. He doesn't close his own eyes until he's sure that Jeonghan is asleep.