Reckless (Reckless #1)

Reckless - Bonus Chapter Six

Bonus Chapter Six

Nash - Letters and Last Looks

Something white catches my eye as I walk toward my apartment door. I’d been playing my guitar, lost in the song that I had wanted to play just for Addy. But after the whole f*cked up argument we had, that chance is over.

Bending down I pick up the envelope that has my name on the front in cursive writing. Moving to my couch, I rip open the envelope and take out the piece of paper inside. Unfolding the paper, I notice familiar handwriting; to be specific, Addy - er - Adelaide’s handwriting.

Nash,

I’ve been staring at this piece of paper for hours, trying to figure out where to start and what to say. I would need all the time in the world to put down into words everything that I want to say to you.

But I don’t have that much time. So I’ll begin with this:

My mother used to say that life is full of second chances; that we have the power to fix any disaster that we create. She would remind me that nothing is permanent, and there is always a way to remove something from my life.

I’ve believed that my whole life.

Until I met you.

I went through my whole childhood being careless. I didn’t care what happened to me - if I got hurt or if I got in trouble. All I wanted to do was be free; to be alive. And I was. I was a walking disaster, as my mom liked to call me. I just about broke every rule that my parents enforced. I never listened. I didn’t have a care in the world.

But that all changed when I lost her.

My mother was my rock. She was my guardian. I could go to her for anything and always expect something back from her. She never denied me anything. I loved her - I always will.

When she passed, I went into a dark stage. I did what any eleven year old would do. I wouldn’t talk to anyone. I kept to myself. I ignored my father. I thought God was punishing me because He wouldn’t answer my one prayer: to bring my mother back.

As time passed by, I watched my dad get worse. He turned to alcohol, drowning himself in booze rather than watching over me. He didn’t always use to be this bad. He never drank. But my mother was his world, and he couldn’t look at someone who reminded him of her.

It was in that moment - when I saw my dad passed out on the couch, drunk out of his mind - that I realized I needed to help. So, I started going from house to house, asking for any type of job that I could do in order to earn some cash. I kept the house running - buying groceries and necessities.

An eleven year old.

When I got into highschool, I didn’t do anything a normal teenager would do. I didn’t go shopping with friends. I didn’t go to parties. Well, except one - but that’s a different story. I was an adult. I grew up. I wasn’t that careless girl anymore, and I was afraid to go back to that. I was afraid to lose someone else again.

But when I met you, everything came back to me.

All the memories drifted back, reminding me of the girl I was. You were the one who brought her back out of me. All the times we spent together pieced that girl back together. And if I’m being honest, I’m glad. Because that’s me. That’s my true self.

I’m reckless, Nash.

And I can’t change that.

When I ran away from home, I didn’t expect to make friends. I didn’t expect to fall in love. All I wanted was a chance to restart my life - forget about the past that I once had. But my time in Hudson, with you, reminded me that I can’t forget.