32.No more sane

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A/N: Hay, Stars! So, I'm planing on taking this book to 42 or 45 chapters, somewhere around there. This book... Fucking sucks.... I had so many plans for it when I first started it but now... The plans just.. Wasn't there? Like ig I forgot what I wanted to do for this book.. But I tried to save it, and I did a little, but its still so so so very bad. My writing will get better, just like my art (o.0) eNjOy OwU

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Jacks P.O.V.

"What!? What do you mean your not allowed to!?" Mark yelled as he started to panic at my words. He was wide eyed and looked like he'd seen a ghost of some kind.

"I just can't! Even though I want to, I still can't!" I yelled at him, mad at myself even if there's not a reason why to be. Tears now run down my face as he stills makes remarks in my head, making me feel bad about myself... Why am I letting him get to me...?

Mark eyes start to swell up with tears "What do you mean?! Whats stopping you from telling me?!" he yells back. 

What is stopping me from telling him?... 

Me..

I cover my face as it seems like a waterfall is coming from my blue eyes that everyone loves. I don't say anything, I mean, what am I supposed to say? I don't even have an answer... But then again I do.. I just can't bring myself to say it. He'll think I'm insane, and that's not good at all.

A few minutes past by, where both as quite as a mouse, only panting from yelling so loud can be heard. He sits back down on the bed, well, I guess he does as the bed dips next to me, my hands still covering my face that he thinks is so pretty.

He puts his hands on my arms, trying to pull them free from my head, but I don't let him move them. "Baby.. Please.." He sighs and I shake my head, whimpering out a no. I don't want him to see me like this, I don't want anyone to see me like this. 

He hates seeing me cry. One night he even went on a whole rant about it, he can't stand it! A lot of people don't like seeing me cry, most of them our my subscribers. 

He finally tugs them free from my face and head. "Oh Jack..." he wraps his strong and warm arms around me, whispering sorry's every now and then. The tears sting my cuts on my arms that where lose around his body. But I don't mind, I have had worse but I also have had better... 

"I.. I.."

"...You?"

"I can't.. T-tell you because he said h-he will h-hurt you..."

"What?..."

I pulled away from him, looking him in the eyes. "He's gonna hurt you if I tell you... I don't want you to get hurt Mark.. That's the very least thing I want." I state taking a deep breath. I look up at him with fear and guilt in my eyes. 

My gaze was meet by scared, confused, fear filled soft brown eyes. 

He thinks I'm crazy...

He thinks I'm crazy...

He thinks I'm crazy...

Yes... He does...

Get the fuck out of my head!

Oh... But whats the fun in that?..

"What the fuck... Whats happening? WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!!!" Mark yells and puts a hand throw his hair, his eyes darting around our bedroom. 

"I don't know! I don't know..." I sob into my hands. 

I wish he would leave me alone... Demons don't just leave you alone though.. You need to fight back, something I can't do at the moment. 

I'm too weak.

I've always been.

Or... I think I've been.

Maybe not.. 

"Can.. Can we just talk about this in the morning..?" I ask while sobbing, just a little less roughly. He nods his head, not saying a word while he crawls back to his spot in bed. I lay back down with him, feeling his arms warp around me as he spoons me.

I slowly fall back to sleep, letting the darkness take me.

Your weak like I always said you where..

I know...

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A/N: Hay Stars! I took a little break! It really helped :) I feel better now. But yeah.. I don't really like this book.. Its boring... Well, anyways, buh bye! See ya next Monday!

Edited- 12/14/2020

-Midnight🖤









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